Suddenly a new life
by lelema
Summary: S04 EP17 What if it was not about divorce? What if the night (8 years ago) was not without consequences? How would Jay deal with the news?
1. Chapter 1

**INFORMATION**

Hello. I hope my English is okay. I'm from Germany. Please don't be so strict with the grammar, but of course you can tell me a mistake so I can consider it. I like to read suggestions for improvement, criticism and wishes!

This story begins with Season 4 Episode 17

 **Note:** some dialogues are taken from the above episode and partially a little changed. This story is fictitious.

 **Story:**

After Abby Jay went to see the divorce papers, they met in the evening in a bar. After reveling in the memories, Jay refused another drink and wanted to leave the whole story behind as quickly as possible. But what if Abby was not about Jay her feelings for him to stand but to let him know that the night was not without consequences...

 **CPDCPDCPDCPDCPD**

 **Jay´s POV**

"I could still have a drink," Abby said.

"Um ... not for me," I declined.

"Do you still have to work?" Abby asked.

"It was too much then," I replied truthfully.

"So I think it was just right," Abby said.

"I'd better sign the papers now and then I'll disappear," I said. I just did not understand Abby. Was she trying to become close to me, even though she was engaged?

"I have no papers and there is no one in Philadelphia," Abby said. Surprised, I looked at her. She lied to me, just why?

"Abby?" I said.

"We are not married anymore, if you mean that. But I'm here for a very different reason... Do you remember the night in the hotel room? Well... how can I tell you? "Abby said nervously.

"Say what?" I asked. At night I can remember only fragmentary. We had a lot, very much drunk. I only know the next day when I woke up next to her in bed.

"We have a child," Abby said, tearing down her cheeks. She smiled at me with a slight grin. I looked into her brown eyes, stunned and completely overwhelmed. I just could not believe what I heard. She has a child? No... WE have a child. Then the child must already be 7 years old. For 7 years she has concealed my child from me... if it is my child at all...

"What?" I said after my voice returned.

"We have a child," Abby repeated.

"Is it really my child?" I asked in disbelief.

Abby nodded and said, "You can do a paternity test."

"How is that possible? We have prevented. "I ask horrified.

"It does not matter anymore. The child is there, "Abby said.

I nodded, "And you're really sure I am ..."

"Yes," Abby interrupted. I nodded. At the time, I did not know what to say. She lied to me because of the divorce papers to tell me now that we have a common child?

"We're doing a test," I said.

"Good." said Abby.

"How old?" I asked.

"Six years. In 4 weeks already 7. ", Abby smiling.

"Why now?" I asked.

"You should get to know each other before I'm the evil mother," Abby said.

I nodded blankly. If it really is my child, then I should have known it much earlier...

"I'm registering for the paternity test," I said, standing up and leaving the bar.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

At home I grabbed my bag when Erin came to our bedroom at the same moment.

"Hello," I said and grabbing the rest.

"Hello?" Erin asked irritated.

"Um, I'm going to Will for a while," I said.

"I don't want you to move out." Erin said.

"I do not, because I love you. I'm not proud of my past - believe me. Um, I'm not married anymore, but now I have something else to clarify and um why should I first take off for a while. "I said.

"I deal with it no matter what it is." Erin said. So she would come to terms with a child whose existence I had learned only a few hours ago and that it might be my child?

"Erin I cannot tell you now because I have to figure it out myself," I said. I would only put unnecessary stress into the relationship if it turned out to be wrong afterwards.

"I'm sorry," I added. I hugged her in goodbye and took the bag and left the apartment.

In the following days, I passed the paternity test. The needed DNA of the child brought me Abby. She was silent on whether it was a boy or a girl, not to mention the name. So I would only know, if the test is positive.

It took me 2 days to get the results, which were in the envelope. I would have liked to tear the letter. I did not want to know the answer. I do not know if I should be glad or sad, if it were not my child. In the last few days, I had a lot of thought about the moments I missed in the child's life. The birth, the first steps and words, the enrollment and much more. On the other hand, I watched the children playing in the park. A child, who came to me after the school, and called me 'daddy', would make me the happiest man. I do not care whether boy or girl. Only healthy and happy it should be.

"I see you got the result.", Said Will, sipping the beer and turned the TV on mute. I nodded and sat down in the chair. Will opened another beer, which he gave me.

"Have you looked inside?" Will asked curiously. I shook my head.

"The answer could change your life," Will said.

"I know." I said, and buried my face in his hands. "I do not know what answer I would rather," I mumbled.

"Find it out," Will said.

 **INFORMATION**

Do you have any wishes or suggestions?

What is the child's name?

Bye lelema


	2. Chapter 2

**Jays POV**

"Oh God," I murmured, speechless, leaning back in the chair, and drove helplessly through my face. Meanwhile Will took the letter into his hand.

"Mr. Jay Halstead has in all the DNA systems investigated the inheritance features to be demanded for the child's father. It therefore comes as the father in question. This resulted in a paternity probability of over 99.9999%. Based on the present investigation, it is practically proven that Mr. Jay Halstead is the biological father of the child, " he read the letter aloud.

"Congratulations little brother. You have become a father. Ive always wanted to be an uncle." Will said.

"That cannot be true." I muttered in disbelief. On the one hand I was glad, on the other hand I do not know what I should feel.

"Just do the best of it. Be there for the child, "said Will and I nodded bewildered.

The next day I phoned a relatively long time with Abby. She wanted me to get to know our child as quickly as possible, so we agreed that she would pick me up on Saturday and we would go to the park next to Will's flat.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

"So excited I haven't seen you for a long time." Will grinned.

"I get to know my child today." I said.

"I know and you will tell me everything after my shift," said Will.

"What if the child doesn't need to know me or we don't like us." I said.

"Jay quite calmly. I think the child is eagerly waiting to meet you, "Will said, and patted me on the shoulder.

"You can do it. If necessary, Abby is still there, too. " Will said before he left to go to work.

Nervously, I ran back and forth in the apartment, looking out of the window from time to time, and sat down there and there. The nervousness was almost unbearable. I looked at my watch, then on my smartphone just to make sure the watch went right.

My thoughts were playing more and more crazy. What if I don't correspond to the child's ideas? What if I'm not ready to be a father yet? What if we become inseparable and I don't want to give the child anymore? What if a custody battle makes the newly established relationship broken? How does the child look like? Is it more like Abby or me?

A knock on the door brought me back to reality. I was still breathing deeply three times in and out before I opened the door. My breath stopped. A strange man stood before me. I would guess Latino. He looked a little disheveled and chewed on a chewing gum. He kept a travel bag in his hand. Next to him was a little girl with a stuffed animal under her arm.

"I was told I should deliver the child here," the man said, putting the bag down. I just nodded because my voice stayed away from me. I looked at the little girl. She had shoulder-length brown hair that was braided into two pigtails, brown eyes and light freckles.

"You say the mother did not come along?" I asked confused.

"I should take her to the airport, but she gave me a letter," he replied. I nodded, took the letter and the taxi driver hurried away.

I bent down to the height of my child.

"I'm Jay and you?" I asked gently.

"Lilly," she whispered barely audible.

"Lilly. Do you want to come in? "I asked.

She shrugged her shoulders. I took the bag and led my daughter into the living room. She clasped her stuffed animal shyly and buried her face in it. It was probably not easy deal for both of us with the new situation.

"Would you like something to drink?" I asked overwhelmed after I put down the jam-packed travel bag. She shook her head.

"You can sit down, too. Feel completely at home, " I said.

The travel bag awakened me the impression that the child would probably stay here longer and of course, the fact that Abby was at the airport.

She sat down on the couch while I sat in the armchair. Curious, I opened the letter, which gave me the taxi driver.

Dear Jay,

I'm sorry that you were surprised by the existence of your child. I am confident that our daughter is doing well with you. You might have been surprised that I sent Lilly Rose alone by taxi. And yes you're right, it was no coincidence why now. I was asked by the Army if I could fly back again. I agreed and therefore she needed a new home and you came as a father the only one in question. Please take good care of them! Do not be fooled by her shyness. When she first knows you, she is a girl who is turned upside down.

Ps: in the outer side pocket you will find all important documents.

In love Abby

No no no. That cannot be serious. She cannot leave me alone with my daughter, whom I know since now... I closed my eyes for a moment, breathed deeply, and looked at the girl in front of me.

"Is that your stuffed animal?" I asked to talk to her. She nodded. I tried to keep her eye contact, which was anything but easy as she kept her head down.

"Do you like penguins?" I asked, as her cuddly toy was one. Again she nodded slightly.

"We can go to the zoo," I said. At that moment, Lucy started sniffing in her penguin.

"Hey. What's going on? "I asked gently.

"I want to go home," she whispered, "I want to go to my mummy."

"I know, but it looks like we both have to get along together for a while," I said, squatting in front of her.

"I want my mummy." she cried.

Carefully I moved my hand to her and put it on her small shoulder.

"I'm pretty sure we'll have a lot of fun," I said, smiling at her. I stayed in the perched position for a while before I got up and ran into the kitchen. I tapped Will briefly to inform him that Lilly would probably stay longer. After that, I returned with a glass of juice for her back into the living room.

"Do we want to play something?" I asked. She shook her head.

"Or we go to the park?" I asked. She shook her head again.

"What do you want to do?" I asked. She shrugged her shoulders.

After a while she stood up and opened the large travel bag.

"Can we play this?" She asked, holding up a board game.

"Sure," I replied.

We played at the dining table 'Make n Break'.

"Hey, the time has already expired." I said, but Lilly still built on.

"No. only now. ", she grinned after she had finished building. It was the first time I saw my daughter smile.

"Tell me, what is your favorite food?" I asked. The clock showed already after six and so far we had not ate much.

"Noodles," she said.

"What sauce?" I asked.

"Ketchup," she replied.

I got up to see if I could offer noodles with ketchup, but unfortunately neither of them was available in a man's house.

"How about if we both go shopping and then make noodles with ketchup?" I asked, and she nodded slightly.

When I opened the door to the back seat of my car I noticed that I did not have a child seat either. I decided slowly and carefully to drive to the next supermarket. At some point we were standing with a shopping cart full of biscuits, ice cream, gummy bears, but also noodles, a bottle of ketchup, apple juice and much more what children like at the checkout.

"Jo Halstead. What's going on? "Antonio greeted me.

"Hey Antonio," I greeted him. I have not seen him for a long time. After all, he was no longer working for the Intelligence. At the word Intelligence I stopped thoughtfully. My colleagues do not know anything about my daughter. How can I tell Erin that I have a little girl?

"Wow, and who are you?" Antonio asked my daughter.

"Lilly," she said tightly.

"I did not know you were a babysitter." Antonio laughed.

"To be honest, I'm not a babysitter," I said.

Antonio looked back and forth between me and Lilly.

"Wow. Of course. Congratulation. And how do you feel like a freshly baked father? "He said.

Antonios investigator instinct still works excellent.

"Amazingly, I guess." I said.

"Lilly. If your daddy annoys you too much, then you come to me and I'll teach you to box. "Antonio said, and she nodded lightly.

Back at home we cooked together noodles. It was a mystery to me how to eat noodles with ketchup. The food was way too sweet, but it seems to taste it.

Later in the evening I noticed another problem. The apartment had 2 bedrooms, but the one was Will. Lilly would get my room and I'll take the couch in the living room.

"Jay?" She asked. She was in the bathroom and should wash, brush the teeth and make ready for bed.

"Yes?" I replied.

"I have no pajamas." Lucy said.

"Uh, yes. Are you sure? "I asked, and she nodded. I rummaged around again even in her bag. Jeans, sweatshirt, sweater jacket, underwear, T-shirts, but no jogging pants or leggings. And also the bag was very sparingly packed. There was only the most necessary.

"Wait a minute," I said, walking into my bedroom. I pulled out an older T-shirt from the chest of drawers. Back in the bath she put on the shirt. It was definitely too big, but ideal as a night shirt.

"Did you brush your teeth?" I asked.

Lilly nodded and I showed her where she could sleep. I stopped at the door while she was comfortable in bed. I was unsure whether I should read her a story, on the other hand, she can certainly read for herself. I thought for a short moment, if I should not give her at least a good night kiss, but since we did not know for a long time I let it be.

"Where are you sleeping?" She asked.

"On the sofa in the living room," I replied, and she nodded.

"Good night Lilly." I said.

"Jay. Can the door stay open? "Lilly asked.

"Sure," I said.

I researched a little more in Lilly's papers. I wondered that Lilly was wearing my surname and not her mother's. I tried to call Abby, but without success.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

Early in the morning I woke up by the crashing of the apartment door. I looked up from the couch and recognized Will.

"Morning," I muttered sleepily.

"Good morning," Will grinned. I followed him to the kitchen, where I made coffee and Will baked pancakes. We sat at the dinner table and talked.

"So it has become a girl and she will stay here? How long? "Will and I nodded.

"Abby sent her by taxi. I do not know how long, but she's back in the army. So she's going to stay here for a few months, "I said.

"Understand. How do you feel about the whole thing? "Will asked.

"I dont know. She is still very shy and it feels unfamiliar to have a child around, "I said.

"It takes time," said Will.

"I'll try to find a school and a nanny next day," I said.

"A nanny seriously? She should get to know us first, "said Will.

"I have to work. I cannot take a child with me, "I said.

"I can take care of her until my shift starts." Will said.

"And after that?" I asked.

"I'm going to bring you the child, so they can get to know each other," Will said.

"In the long run also no solution." I said.

We broke our conversation as we heard little footsteps.

"Good morning Lilly. Did you sleep well? "I asked her. She stopped at the doorway to the kitchen. She held her penguin in front of her and sank her face in it when she saw Will.

"Lilly, this is my brother Will, of whom I told you," I said.

"Hello Lilly," Will grinned.

"Hello," she whispered softly.

"Would you like a pancake?" Will asked and she nodded. She sat down between us without further ado.

"How old are you?" Will asked.

"Almost Seven." She said softly.

"So old." Will grinned.

"How old are you?" She asked.

"Almost five times older." Will replied.

Lilly tried to figure out the results with her little fingers. "So you're forty-five?" Lilly asked in a cute tone. I could not help but laugh.

"And now minus 11." Will replied calmly. Again she tried to figure it out with her fingers.

"Thirty-four," Lilly said, and Will nodded satisfied.

"How old are you?" She asked me.

"One year younger than Will," I replied.

„Thirty three.", she said.

"Yeah. Do you have an idea what we want to do today? "I asked, but Lilly shrugged.

"We can go to the park.", Will said and we nodded.


	3. Chapter 3

**Jays POV**

Nervously, I sat at my desk in the district. I did not know when and how to tell my colleagues that I became a father over the weekend. At least when Lilly comes this afternoon, I have to tell them. So I got up and knocked at Voights door. Voight is the boss and should know it first. He raised his head and looked at me expectantly.

"What's so important Halstead." He said. I closed the door behind me before I looked at my sergeant.

"Sergeant. Um. I have to talk to you, "I said.

"And what do you want to talk to me?" Voight asked, leaning back in the chair.

"So. I know it only a few days ago and could hardly believe it myself ... "I stammered.

"Now you come to the point," said Voight.

"I have a daughter who lives with me right now," I said.

Somehow I was relieved when I brought it behind me to tell Voight about it, but somehow I also frightened his expression, because I could not interpret whether he is happy or fires me

"You have a daughter?" Voight asked horrified.

"Um, yes," I replied.

"How old?" Voight asked.

"Almost Seven." I replied.

"Months?" Voight asked.

"Years," I said.

"Seven Years?" he said shocked.

"Yeah." I said.

"Does Erin know about it?" Voight asked.

"No. So far only Will, Antonio and you, "I said: "Will will bring the child .He has to work."

"Good. It's good. Then we can get to know the girl. "Voight smiled and was serious again: "But you should tell Erin it before."

"Yes Sarge." I said and leaving his office.

There was no conversation between Erin and me, as the current case needed our full attention, and before I knew my phone ringing, Platt told me that Will was there.

I went down the stairs where my brother was waiting with my daughter.

"Hey, how are you?" I asked her, who was probably hiding behind Will because of all the people here.

"Good," she whispered.

"We were still shopping. Clothes, child seat and toys. "Will grinned.

"Sounds good," I said.

"I have to go. See you later, "said Will.

"I'll show you where I work okay?" I said, and Lilly nodded slightly. Of course, our good old Sergeant Platt could not resist pursuing this conversation.

"I didn't know that her brother had a child," Platt said in a monotonous tone.

"He didn't, either," I winked at Platt. Speechless, she looked after us. I stood at the gate, put my hand under the scanner, slowly took Lilly's hand and led her up the stairs.

"Guys. This is my daughter, Lilly, "I said. At the same time, everyone looked at us overwhelmed. Voight came out of his office, while Platt put behind us the last step. Ruzek, Atwater, Kim and Al left everything to lie, to admire the reserved girl, who was easily hidden behind me. Erin, on the other hand, looked at me with a questioning facial expression.

"Ha! That was the best April Fool's joke I ever hea..." Platt broke off her remark after she realized that it was a fact.

"I didn't know you had a daughter," Kim said.

"I didn't know either," Erin replied slightly annoyed.

"Hello Lilly. I'm Hank, "said Voight, bending down to her high point, holding out his hand to greet her. With a slow reserved reaction she finally took the hand of the sergeant.

"Everything is quite new to you, huh?" Voight asked, and she nodded slightly.

"So Lilly. These are Al, Kevin, Adam, Kim, Trudy and Erin. "Voight introduced one after another.

"Can I ask how old you are?" Erin asked, and Lucy gesticulated with her fingers a seven.

"Come with me, I'll show you the area." Voight said. Erin and I had to talk to each other urgently.

"Will not Jay come with us?" Lucy asked, glancing between us.

"I think he has something to do, but we can do it without him," Voight said, leading her toward the interrogators as I followed Erin into the break room.

I just closed the door behind me as Erin started the Conservation.

"Seriously Jay? A child? And you never told me about it? She's seven, "Erin said irritably.

"Almost seven." I improved.

"Did you ever planned to tell me about the child?" Erin asked.

"Erin. I know it only since last week. More specifically on the day I moved in with Will. "I said.

"Jay you have a child," Erin emphasized again.

"I know. I'm sorry I couldn't tell you sooner. But I wanted to make sure she was my child, "I said.

"Apparently she is," said Erin, distractedly.

"Yeah, and Abby ... she sent the kid to me on Saturday and then just flown overseas," I explained.

"And the child lives with you." Erin said.

"Yes. Erin, I think I need time with her until she has settled in. "I tried to explain further.

"I also need time to think." Erin said.

"Okay. I'm sorry." I said, slightly offended. For some reason, it was clear that it had to happen. We both needed time to come to terms with the new circumstances.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

Now 4 days have passed since Lilly was standing at my door. I still didn't reach Abby. I tried to give Lilly stability in everyday life and reported her to a school near the apartment and the area. So to speak today was her first day at a new school. I understood more and more what Abby meant with her shyness. While she slowly opened at home especially Will, she remained very reserved in public.

It was already evening and Lilly slept in my room, at least I thought it. After hearing that she was talking to someone, I listened to the leaned door. Through the small gap I saw how she held an old cell phone to her ear.

"But I want to go home now," she sniffed, "But I don't know anyone here ... Yes, but it's a new school without friends ... Yeah? Then just go back again ... please Mummy. I want back home ... I want you ... I miss you terribly ... Yes, of course ... He's all right ... it is okay. Will has bought new toys and clothes and then I was with Jay at work ... already, but I still want to you ... when are you coming back? ... so long? ... I try ... I love you too Mummy ... bye. "

Lilly wiped her tears down her cheeks and tucked away the phone in her backpack.

At the sight of a crying Lilly I was sad. My thoughts circled around her words 'He's all right' - why I'm just all right? Do I really not agree with her ideas? Am I a miserable father? Why my daughter doesn't feeling well? Of course, a new environment, new school and new people in her lives, but that she owes to Abby not to me. The blame Abby is, of course, not right, but she doesn't have to see her unhappy daughter.

Through Will who had just come home from Molly my thoughts returned to reality.

"Hey," he greeted me, I nodded to him and followed him into the living room.

"The conversation topic number one was Lilly." Will said happily.

"Yeah." I mumbled.

"What's wrong?" Will asked anxiously.

"She just talked to Abby," I told him.

"So what? She's her mum, "Will said.

"Sure. But ... she doesn't feel well here, "I explained.

"The father also listens to the telephone conversations," Will grinned.

"I'm serious Will. I want Lilly to have a nice time with me or rather with us."I said.

"How long have you known each other? Four days? Lilly needs trust in us. How would you feel like a little girl if you suddenly had to live with her father and uncle? " Will said.

„Yes you are right" I said.

"We should go on a trip with her, don't you think?" Will and I nodded.

Said and done. Friday after school we both picked Lilly up from school. On the way to the apartment we asked her several excursion possibilities.

"Have you ever thought about what we want to do over the weekend?" I asked once and looking back through the mirror.

"No," Lilly replied curtly.

"We can go to the zoo," I suggested.

"Okay," she said.

"Or we'll go swimming. Chicago has a great indoor waterpark. " Will said.

"But I cannot swim." Lilly said.

"Then we'll teach you," I said.

"Is that difficult?" she asked.

"No, and besides, we're with you." Will said.

"Can we go to the zoo before?" Lilly asked.

"Saturday zoo and Sunday water park okay?" Will suggested

"Yeah!" Lilly said.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

Lilly enjoyed a lot at the zoo this afternoon. One can even say that she was a bit turned up the more animals we saw. Beaming with joy, we visited every single animal enclosures and at the end she wanted to put each animal home with us. Fortunately, we were able to convince her of another stuffed animal - this time a lion baby. In the evening, Lilly was completely open, instead of to play or even to watch a children's series, she preferred that I played with her. Will was at the time already in Molly.

So we decided to build a kind of cave made of chairs, the sofa and many cushions and blankets in the living room. After initial difficulties, we had built the perfect covert, where we both took a break.

"Perfect or not?" I grinned.

"There's still something missing," Lil said, getting up and coming back a little later with gummibars and their stuffed animals.

"Now it's perfect," she smiled.

We ate gummibars and played a card game for a while

"Jay. Did you want a child at all? "Lilly asked, and I looked at her in surprise. Our eyes met and I did not know what to say.

"Um. Is a difficult question. But yes I think so." I said.

"Why didn't you stay with Mum then?" She asked.

"What did Abby tell you?" I asked curiously. I felt the slight suspicion that Abby never told our daughter the truth.

"Not much. Just that you left us, "Lilly replied.

"We've both parted. Long before you were born. "I corrected that statement.

"You didn't know anything about me, did you?" She asked and I nodded in agreement.

"If I had known, I would have been there for you." I said, and Lilly just nodded slightly. For a while it remained quiet in the cave and we played the card game to the end.

"You should go to bed." I said.

"Cannot we sleep here?" Lilly asked. Admittedly, you lay comfortably on all the pillows and blankets. Above all, I found the 'we' beautiful. Lilly gave me the impression of feeling at last comfortable.

"Yeah." I said. Lilly crawled to the cave exit to quickly get ready for bed. I also use the opportunity to wear a cozy jogging pants, as well as T-shirt. Then we both settled in the cave again.

"Can you still tell me a story?" Lilly asked tired.

"A story? Oh God, I don't know a good story." I replied.

"Then tell something about yourself." Lilly said.

"How about you tell me something about you first?" I said and looking at her. A week Lilly is already with me, but very much I did not know about her yet.

"Um. OK. My name is Lilly Rose Halstead. In just under 3 weeks I will be 7 years old. I like to paint. I do a lot of sport. I want a puppy. My favorite food is noodles with ketchup and not tomato sauce, because that is disgusting. And school is totally unnecessary because you always get homework, " Lilly said.

"What kind of sport are you doing?" I asked.

"Athletics," she replied.

"What are your favorite disciplines?" I asked.

"Running," she replied.

"We can go jogging together," I grinned.

"But not tomorrow early in the morning, because I'm always tired." She said.

"You're a lazy girl," I grinned.

"Only during the week," she grinned sleepily.

Within a few seconds she slept. Even with me. It was not long before my eyes fell.

The next morning I was awakened by a loud noise followed by a swearing - it was clearly Will.

"Good morning." He woke us, that means I was already awake only Lilly was clearly a long sleeper - not only during the week...

"How do you actually get a little girl awake?" I asked grinning.

"Mh. Perhaps simply by tickling times. "Will mused.

"Well then," I grinned.

"NO!" Lilly squealed and stood up immediately before we had the opportunity to tickle her.

"Or so." Will laughed.

We finished and drove to the water park. It was a large complex with several swimming and relaxation pools, many slides and jump towers, as well as a play and sauna area. We bought Lilly a bathing suit, which you got on the outskirts and started our exclusive swimming course alla Halstead.

"You can still go quite pure. Here you can still stand, "I said.

"And if not?" Lilly asked.

"Lilly don't worry we're with you," I said.

"Come here." Will said. He took her hand and led her down the steps into the water.

"You see, you can still stand," said Will and Lilly nodded.

"Okay, Lilly," I said, taking her hand: "You lie down on the belly. I hold you all the time. I Promised."

It took time, but Lilly got it some way. It wouldn't be enough for seahorses, but it was still a start. Ultimately, I had the biggest problems to let Lilly go for a moment. We spent the rest of the day playing ball or sliding.

The weekend ended quickly. A premature nanny I also found - the elderly neighbor from opposite cleared herself ready to take care of Lilly. So I could finally go back to the Mollys with my colleagues and friends. The news with Lilly have also been put back now, after they all learned. Also with the work I was again more flexible.

 **INFORMATION**

How do you like the story so far?

Do you have any suggestions, ideas or criticism?

I hope you like the story and I know my English is bad ;)

In the next chapters, it will finally be exciting.

Bye Lelema.


	4. Chapter 4

**Jays POV**

It was already Wednesday night. While Lilly was taking a shower, I rummaged around the backpack to get the phone number. Apparently, Abby had had another phone number for Lilly, which made her only available to her daughter. After all, my sensed one hundred phone calls and messages were ignored by her.

I waited until Lilly went to bed and slept before I chose the new number from Abby.

"Hello." her voice said.

"Hello Abby. Long heard nothing from you. "I said calmly.

"Jay ... how did you know ... Lilly." She stammered.

"Lilly knows nothing about it, "I said.

"What do you want? I don't have much time, "she said angrily.

"I want to know from you why you leave your daughter alone," I said.

"My daughter? She is yours too. I had to get rid of my flight, "she said.

"Why are you in the Army anyway? You have a child! "I said something louder.

"Maybe because the Army is my life. I've waived 7 years, "she said.

"That doesn't give you the right to impose a child on me and then go away!" I said.

"Looks like the super-detective came to his limits," Abby said.

"Don't you understand what you've done? It was called a meeting in the park and not I did send the child by taxi and went off. Do you know what could have happened? "I said.

"If you don't want Lilly, send her to a boarding school," Abby said.

"Yes exactly. I'm sending a 7-year-old to the boarding school! "I ironed.

"What is your problem?" Abby asked.

"My problem is that I had a happy life with a girlfriend a few weeks ago, and from now on I must be playing Daddy while you are in Afghanistan," I replied.

I love my daughter very much. Never could I leave Lilly in the long run more, but Abbys behavior I simply didn't find in order. I just had to let off steam.

"I'm sorry Jay. The child also messed up my life, "she said.

"Why didn't you tell me right from the beginning that I was supposed to take care of Lilly and you were away for a longer time?" I calmed down again and became quieter.

"I just didn't know how you react. I didn't know if you wanted a child, "she said.

"Of course. Lilly is my child and a great little girl. How long do you stay? "I asked.

"Probably a whole year," she replied.

"In less than two weeks it's her birthday." I said softly.

"I know. She loves chocolate cream pie, "she said.

„Okay." I said.

"Is Lilly doing well? Did she settled in? "Abby asked gently.

"Yeah I Think so. We spent the weekend at the zoo and a waterpark. She's getting more relaxed and open, "I said.

"That's nice to hear Jay. Take care of our girl. Maybe we can make a videochat for her birthday."Abby said.

"She would definitely happy about it," I said, "Abby. Take care of yourself, too. Lilly needs you. "

I finished the phone call and leaned back on the sofa. Lilly will live here for a whole year? Definitely, I need a larger apartment. She needed her own room and I returned to a bed, although the sofa bed was okay. Above all, I have to save the relationship with Erin. Yes Lilly exists, but there is no reason why Erin should be angry. I knew nothing about Lilly and it was long before our relationship. I have not cheated to her. Erin would certainly be a good friend for her.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

My alarm clock woke me up early in the morning. I went for a shower, dressed, and made coffee before I wanted to wake up Lilly. This was our everyday routine in the morning now.

I opened the door and approached the bed. Gently I tried to grab Lilly to shake her slightly at the shoulder. But my hand reached into the void. Only a few cushions formed their bodies under the blanket.

"Damn," I murmured. I searched the apartment and called for her. Nothing. Finally, I woke up Will, who came home late at night.

"Jay what's going on?" He asked sleepily.

"Lilly is gone." I replied worried.

"You sure? Maybe she's in the bathroom or plays hide. "Will mumbled.

"Yes. She is gone. She is neither in the bathroom nor under the bed or in the closet. Damn shit - Will. I lost a 7-year-old within 12 days. "I said horrified.

"Keep calm detective. Can it be that Lilly is with the neighbor? "Will asked.

"I don't know. Jacket, scarf, gloves, hat, shoes and backpack are gone. "I replied truthfully.

"Or build a snowman outside," Will thought, looking out into the snowy landscape.

"You're not much help," I said angrily.

I looked for my stuff and rang the bell next to the neighbor, who had not heard of Lilly either. First, Will and I searched our area and the park - no trace of Lilly. Even on the nearby playground she was not. I asked every single person - nothing.

"It makes no sense. Go back to the apartment again. Tell me when Lilly shows up. I'm going to the district. From there I have better options to look for her, "I said.

"Jay. Everything will be fine. "Will said and I nodded. It looks more and more out then, as if Lilly ran away - but why? She was happy, after all?

On the way to the District I stopped here and there looking for my daughter. But without success.

"Wow. Detective-super-bad-humored. The clock change was already, " Platt said.

Without comment, I sprinted up the stairs to the Intelligence. I was one and a half hours late and on top of that Lilly had disappeared.

"Halstead. Nice to see you today." Voight said gruffly.

"Lilly. This morning she was not in her bed. Her backpack is also gone, "I explained. I hung a picture of both of us on the wall. It was a selfie, which we did together at the weekend. I had the picture developed only a few days ago. It was the only picture I had of Lilly at all.

"I want everyone patrolman this city gets a picture of her. In addition, every subway station, bus station, airport and train station should be checked. From me to every playground and every shopping center of the city, "I added.

"We need a motive. Why is Lilly gone? What is her destination? With whom she could be? "Al mused.

"Ruzek look at all the surveillance records around Halstead's apartment and locate her cell phone. Lindsay and Atwater drive the area again. Al and Burgess inform you if Lilly is perhaps with friends or with other well-known persons. Halstead on a word. "Voight said.

I followed Voight in his office and closed the door behind me.

"Did something happen at home?" He asked.

"No. Not that I know. "I replied.

"Kids don't run away just like that. Had she anger with Will or the Nanny? "Voight asked.

"No. She and Will understand each other very well. I don't know. She would then talk to me. "I replied.

"Think about it. Why should Lilly run away? "Voight said.

"I don't know. There was nothing happening ... that is, I talked to Abby last night," I thought, and I sat down on the chair. I ran my hands through my face before I confessed, "It could be that Lilly heard something that wasn't meant for her. I've made Abby's allegations of why she is forcing a child on me, which I ultimately didn't mean. "

"That explains a lot." Voight said, "Stay calm Halstead. We are all looking for her. "

"There are minus five degrees Celsius outside," I said.

"It's all the more important that we find her as soon as possible," said Voight.

I nodded and left his office. After several unsuccessful hours, everyone in the large office met for the exchange of information.

"What do we know so far?" Voight asked

"No luck with cell phone location. But I've found a video recording of her. At first I thought she had run away in the middle of the night, but the records a street corner from the apartment, showed her at 6.10 and at 7.23. She was finally at a subway station." Ruzek said.

"She knew exactly when I was taking a shower," I muttered speechless.

"Lilly has a grandmother in Philadelphia. She lives in the retirement home," said Al.

"These are more like 19 hours by train", Atwater said.

"We have scoured the region. No Lilly." Erin said

"OK. Checks the stops of possible subway routes. The route to Philadelphia is to be monitored. The train crew and bus staff should be informed. Also the police in Indiana, Ohio and Pennsylvania." Voight said.

"Will be done." Erin said and took the phone in her hand.

A felt eternity passed, but there was simply no news. No one camera captured Lilly and we didn't know where to look for her anymore. All areas where a child would go were checked several times by us. Everyone was looking for Lilly. Even the surrounding hospitals were telephoned by Kim.

"That's all? We'll stop for today? "I asked in horror. The clock showed shortly after 11pm.

"What do you think I should do?" Voight asked.

"She can freeze in the cold," I replied, slightly irritated.

"I cannot just conjure up the child. She knows where to find a warm place, "said Voight.

"And if she is hurt?" I said.

"Jay. We do EVERYTHING to find your daughter, but exhausted detectives don't help me. Take a rest. Sleep out, " Voight said.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

At home I looked at the painted pictures of Lilly. Meanwhile, they embellished my room. I looked at her drawing pad, which lay on the dresser. She painted very well. I flipped through page after page and stopped at a drawing. "Me with Daddy and Uncle Will," I read softly. A slightly sad smile spread out. Daddy, I thought silently. So far she just called me Jay.

I lay down on the other side of my bed. I pulled my cell phone out of my pocket to check my messages. Instead, I opened the self-image and looked back and forth between the picture and the empty bedside.

"Where are you?" I asked softly. A tear streamed down my cheek. This girl did it. She has penetrated my heart in just a few days. So far it had only been Erin. I could never forgive myself if Lilly never came home again.

At night I didn't sleep very well. I thought about what might happen and how I should tell Abby that Lilly was gone.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

I was the first of us detectives in the office and rechecked all surveillance cameras. Gradually everyone came. Through the windows to Voight's office, I watched as he phoned worried and Al stood beside him. He was terrified. He talked to Al and then they came out to us.

"Her backpack was found. Lincoln Avenue, "said Voight in a quiet tone.

"At the Chicago River." Atwater said.

"Yes. The backpack was in the water," said Voight.

"W-What?" I said in a trembling voice. I watched as almost everyone stood petted. It was bad news - damn bad news. The chance of survival is zero and we all knew that.

"Squad 3 is on the spot with divers," informed Al.

"Halstead. Come on lets go." Voight said.

 **INFORMATION**

minus 5 degrees Celsius = 23 degrees Fahrenheit


	5. Chapter 5

**Jay POV**

"Sergeant Voight. Detective Halstead. "Kelly Severide greeted us.

"I heard she was your daughter, Detective," Severide said, "My condolences."

"They have found Lilly?" I asked, shaken.

At the same moment I felt a painfully piercing feeling in me. No way. This cannot be true. This is more like a nightmare. Lilly is too young to die. Stunned, even helpless, I looked into the cool water. Lilly couldn't even swim. How did she get into the river? How couldn't he know it? Lilly has been missing for 24 hours, as long as you did not survive in a cold river.

"She cannot swim," I murmured to myself.

"No, but we found her backpack, which means that the child drowned.," explained Severide, "Especially since she couldn't swim"

"Watch what you say, Lieutenant. Without a body no dead. The girl can still be alive." Voight exhorted.

"Excuse me Sergeant. You are right," Severide said.

"Just go to your work," I murmured.

I took the backpack, which contained her penguin, a pack of biscuits, a bottle of apple juice, a drawing-block, colored pencils, and five dollars. Of course everything was soaking wet. Again a tear streamed down my cheek. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes for a moment. I just do not know what to believe.

"Do you think Lilly is in the river?" I asked my sergeant when we went back on the road to the District.

"Do you think so?" Voight asked.

"I don't know. I don't know anything more. I mean I lost a child in record time." I replied.

"There can be a thousand reasons why the backpack lay in the river. We should just believe that Lilly is safe, "said Voight.

Back at the police station, I was greeted by Erin with a hug.

"Jay. We'll find Lilly. ", Erin whispered in my ear and I nodded.

Voight informed the rest of the team about the urgency of the situation "What we know is that the backpack was found in the Chicago River. We don't know how he got there, or where Lilly is. Ask your informants again. A second night in the cold can go bad for her. "

"Are we sure Lilly is not in the river? I mean Lilly has been missing for over 24 hours. We have no current record, and no witnesses who have seen the child." Atwater said.

"We're not sure at all. The fact is that Lilly is somewhere in the cold." Voight hissed.

A few hours later the news of the Squad 3 reached us that the search in the water was stopped on the grounds that it had now become too dark.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

At home I sat desperately with a beer in my hand in the kitchen, where I stared at the painted picture of the three of us at the refrigerator. I had taken it out of her drawing block and attached it to the door with magnets.

"Is there any news?" Will asked gently and sat down beside me.

"Her backpack was found in the water." I said sadly.

"Oh no. That's awful, " Will said beating, "How are you doing?"

"Crappy.", I replied and I took a beer out of the box, "I miss her."

"Not only you," Will said.

"Lilly is perhaps long dead." I mumbled hopelessly.

"Don't say that Jay." He said.

"It's my fault that she's gone." I said. Suddenly the sadness prevailed. I let my emotions run wild. This was unusual for me. Mostly I can pull myself together well. But this time I have failed. I have not protected my own child. My own child may be dead. I'm not ready to bury my daughter. In all these years, I thought my father was the worst. But I was not a piece better.

"Jay. Stop it. You have done nothing wrong. You couldn't know Lilly was listening to the phone call." he consoled me.

"I should not have been allowed to make such a loud phone call." I said.

"Jay. Please don't blame you. You had all right to confront Abby. Her behavior was not correct. Abby should have said the truth from the beginning." Will said.

"It doesn't matter anymore. Lilly is gone and I'm the worst father ever." I said.

"No you are not. Our dad earned the title, but not you. We have to be optimistic," he said.

"I think the worst thing that can happen to you is the uncertainty of where your own child is. At the river I thought, 'Oh God my child is dead' and that was a painful feeling. Not knowing what happened and where she is, is a feeling that tears you," I said.

"Okay, Jay. I understand. How much beer did you drink? "Will asked and I pointed to the empty box.

"Stop drinking. Become sober again and bring your child home. Immediately! " he said.

I nodded and we finally gave ourselves a brotherly hug before I swayed to my bed.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

The next day, a Saturday, I was the first in the office. Although I had very strong headaches. Lilly isn't dead. She is alive. I just know it - father instinct. Everything else would make no sense. As Voight already said, there can be a thousand reasons why the backpack was in the river.

"How do you feel?" Erin asked softly.

"I don't know," I said, "I just want my daughter back."

"She is a great girl. And she looks very much like you – Jay." Erin said, "The hope dies last."

"Yeah." I said.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

The team discussed the further search operations when Antonio stormed up the stairs.

"A source claims to have seen Lilly. She was in the company of a young woman called Madison Turner. At the East Side of Chicago." Antonio said.

I breathed a sigh of relief.

"In the area there are not many surveillance cameras." Atwater said.

"Madison Turner, 19 years old. An outlier, who was arrested last year for illegal drugs. No permanent home, "Ruzek informed us.

"I want the area to be searched with sniffer dogs. Come on lets go. The child was long enough outside." Voight said.

Atwater with Ruzek, Al with Voight and me with Erin. We drove up and down the streets. Nothing. Neither Lilly nor these Madison we sighted.

Through the police radio we heard an interesting message: "Residents report a dead person 82nd Street."

I shocked.

"That doesn't mean anything," she muttered.

Erin knew what I was getting at. Lilly.

In the area there were many empty houses and side streets. Everything was very down.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

"It's Madison Turner," Atwater said

I approached the body of the young woman. She had long curly blond hair and looked like a typical 19 year old woman. She was murdered. Several shots in the chest or shoulder and a head shot.

With 2 fingers I feel the body temperature. "Her body is still warm." I said.

At these external temperatures the murder was not long ago.

"The murderer is probably still nearby." Al said.

"What if Lilly was there? When it happened? Ruzek asked.

"Then we have to hope that Lilly is safe." Al said.

"Searches the area. Nobody goes until we find the child. " Voight said.


	6. Chapter 6

**Lilly POV**

"You have a child!" Jay said something louder. I woke up at the loud conversation. I think Jay talked to Mum.

"That doesn't give you the right to impose a child on me and then go away …. Don't you understand what you've done? It was called a meeting in the park and not I did send the child by taxi and went off. Do you know what could have happened … Yes exactly. I'm sending a 7-year-old to the boarding school …. My problem is that I had a happy life with a girlfriend a few weeks ago, and from now on I must be playing Daddy while you are in Afghanistan." Jay said.

He was probably not happy to have me in his life. I've destroyed his life. I always wanted a daddy. Mommy's ex-boyfriend was too disagreeable to me. But Jay was very nice from the beginning. He listened to me. He talked to me. He was playing with me. He did not hit me. He was simply there for me. Why so suddenly? Why does not he want me anymore? Did I do something I should not do? He said he wanted children. Or did I just not fit?

Why couldn't I stay with Grandma? Nobody would then have problems because of me. Sure she did not know who I was anymore and I had to tell her that I was her granddaughter, but everyone was happy.

"But I'm not going to a boarding school. No way." I whispered to Pingi, which is my stuffed animal.

The next morning I waited for Dad to take a shower to leave the apartment unnoticed.

I went into some subway. I didn't care what direction. Main thing away. He shall not find me. I'm not going to a boarding school. I want to stay with Grandma. Listen to her great stories and eat biscuits. Besides, Grandma has promised me a puppy.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

"Hey little one. Traveling alone? No school?" an older man said from a car that was parked there.

I did not answer. He scared me.

"Can I help you, little one?" the man said. I remained silent.

"You are probably were well behaved. I am Isaac and you?"

"I cannot talk to strangers, because my mum has forbidden me." I said.

"But you did. Besides, you know as I am now, therefore I am no longer foreign," he said.

"Hey. Fingers away from my sister." A young woman said, "Fuck off!"

The elderly man continued with the carriage. The young woman stayed with me. She had long blond hair. She was dressed in darkness. But she was friendly.

"You're not my sister. I have none." I said.

"Yes you are right. But the man had kidnapped you, raped and murdered you." She said, "I have only previously protected you."

I looked at her in shock. Mum has always told me I should be careful with strangers...

"OK. I am Maddi and I am 19 years old. You can trust me. Are you hungry? I had no lunch yet." She said.

"OK. I'm Lilly." I said.

"Great. What leads you to the street? Stress at home? Parents can be really shit." She said.

"I don't think that my parents are really shit, but I want to go to my grandma. She lives in Philadelphia. And she wants me." I said.

"I understand. Let's have lunch and then I'll take you to your grandma." She said.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

It was night and it was very cold.

"Pingi! Why did you throw my backpack into the water?" I cried aloud.

"Because the stupid cops are looking for you!" she said.

"But my dad isn't stupid!" I screamed.

"Your dad is a cop?" she asked, "Shit. Why did not you say that? He accused me for child abduction or what?" She said.

"You did not ask." I said, "And I thought you wanted to take me to my grandma. Philadelphia is not in Chicago!"

"Relax yourself. I just need to sort things out, but then we can go to Philadelphia." She said, "In any case, we are going to get rid of the cops as soon as they find your backpack."

 **CPDCPDCPD**

"Maddi! Wake up! Maddi! Please. I want to go home." I cried. I shook her by the shoulder. She no longer reacted. She was red. There was more and more blood. Her eyes were rigid.

"Please, Maddi wake up. I don't know where I am." I whispered sadly.

"Hey! What are you doing there?" the bad man shouted.

I looked at him. He held the gun in front of him. He injured Maddi with the gun. I ran. I ran as fast as I could. I didn't look back. I didn't want to see him anymore. I did not want to see the red. It scared me. I just ran straight ahead.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

 **Jay POV**

"If he bends Lilly just a hair, I will kill this bastard personally." I murmured.

"We don't know if he has Lilly." Erin said.

"I know." I said.

"Heads up. Lilly cannot be far yet." Erin said.

Erin and I walked down the street and looked out for Lilly. We turned the whole area upside down. Every corner, every street, every empty house. Nothing.

"If a child witnesses a horror, then it is looking for protection. No matter what kind." an older Woman said.

"Sorry, what did you say?" I said.

"A little girl. Brown hair. Tooth gap. Slim. Athletic.", she said.

"Did you see her?" I asked.

"Sure. Cops aren't capable of anything. Everything has to be done by myself," she said.

"Where is the girl?" Erin asked.

„The girl is frightened, trembling and covered in blood. And where are the police? Nowhere." She said.

"Where is she?" I asked angrily. I have no time to listen to her complaints. An almost seven-year-old has been missing since days. I just want to bring my daughter home.

"I just brought her a cup of tea," she said.

"Where!" I shouted.

"The playground has a play tunnel. I would look there." She said.

"Thank you." Erin said.

Immediately we drove to the nearest playground. It was very deserted. No children were playing. At the cold also no wonder.

Slowly I went to the entrance of the play tunnel. Snuffle and a slight cough were heard.

"Lilly?" I called.

I bent down to see through the opening.

"Lilly." I said, relieved, "Hey Sweetie. Are you okay?"

She was sitting in this tube, trembling. She lifted her head for a short moment. Her lips were slightly bluish and her face chalky-looking. She cried. Her eyes were red.

"It will be all right. You're safe now. I promise you," I said and stretched out my hand for her.

Lilly crawled on all fours to me. When I could reach for her, I pulled her into my arms immediately.

I clutched my little girl. I was relieved. Tears of joy ran down my cheek.

"I've been worried... I was terribly afraid," I said and kissed her on the forehead, "I Love you sweetie."

I could feel Lilly clutching me tightly. She cried easily and put her head on my shoulder. I stroked her back. Worried, I looked at her. At first sight no injuries were visible.

"Are you hurt? Do you feel any pain?" I asked. She shook her head.

"I'm cold." she whispered.

"Let's go. In the car it gets warmer." I said and carrying my child.

Voight personally drove us to the Chicago Med.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

"Hey Lilly I´m Natalie," she said, "How do you feel?"

"Cold." Lilly said.

"I'm going to measure your body temperature," Natalie said, bringing the ear thermometer.

"Ui. 39.2 degrees Celsius. We're doing a blood test," Natalie turned around to April, who nodded.

"Natalie? Is it something serious?" I asked anxiously.

"Looks like chills. Symptoms of a cold. To make sure we make this blood test," Natalie said, "Lilly can I listen to your breathing?" Lilly nodded, so I helped her put the blanket aside.

"Ok. Now you breathe deeply in and out," Natalie said and placed the stethoscope, "The lungs don't sound freely. I want to take a CT scan."

"What does this mean?" I asked.

"We'll know right away." Natalie said.

"Here is a warm tea for the young lady. That helps in chills," Maggie said, handing her a plastic cup before she left the room. April and Natalie also disappeared after the blood collection and the CT scan.

"Hey Lilly, where were you? We made a lot of worries," Will come in.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"No. I must be sorry." I said.

"No one is to blame," Will said.

"But I just ran away," she said.

"Yeah and I didn't notice it," I said, "Please promise me that you will never run away again,"

"I promise you," she said.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

"Hello. I've got some clean and especially dry clothes for Lilly." Erin knocked as she came to the treatment room and put a small bag.

"Thank you Erin," I said

"How are you?" Erin asked.

"I'm warm and cold," Lilly replied.

"She has chills," I explained.

"Okay. Um. Can I ask you a few questions? "Erin asked and Lilly nodded.

"Were you at Madison when the shots came?" Erin asked and Lilly nodded again.

"Did you see who that was?" Erin asked, and Lilly nodded slightly.

"Can you also describe him?" Erin asked when I interrupted her "Erin could we talk briefly?" She nodded and we stepped outside the door.

"What's your point? Lilly will not make any statement." I said.

"Lilly is the only witness and the murderer on the run," Erin explained.

"Exactly because of that. I don't want to put Lilly in danger." I said, and Erin nodded.

"I understand but Lilly can help us," Erin said, "I'm supposed to tell you from Voight that you should take the next day off"

"Okay," I said, "Erin. Thanks again." Then I returned to Lilly. In the meantime, she had fallen asleep.

"Jay. Can we talk?" Natalie said.

"Sure." I said and went outside the door.

"Lilly has only a cold with fever and chills. But that was not all."

"What is wrong with her?"

"She has old rib fractures."

"What does that mean? She did not hurt herself. At least not with me."

"They are old fractures. Longer than you know each other."

"Do you think Lilly was beaten?"

"I don't know. It would be possible. But it can also have been an accident."

"And what now?"

"We will observe it and assist in healing. But you can bring Lilly home. I think it's enough if Will keeps an eye on the injuries."

 **CPDCPDCPD**

During the last few meters to the apartment, she woke up in my arms. In the apartment I put Lilly gently into the warm bed and covered her. I sat on the edge of the bed and looked at the pale and reddish girl.

"Are you really sending me away?" Lilly asked sadly.

"No. No way. You stay with me - here. I promise you." I replied.

"Why do you want me to go to a boarding school?" Lilly asked.

"It was more irony," I said.

"What's that?"

"This is…um… if you only pretend something. So if something is not serious," I said, and Lilly nodded hesitantly.

"I was scared, you know? I thought I didn't see you anymore," I said gently.

"I am sorry. I wanted to my grandma, because I thought that you don't want me anymore." Lilly said.

"I overreacted in the telephone conversation with Abby. Of course I want you with me. We're a good team, aren't we? I wouldn't have forgiven myself if something had happened to you." I said, and Lilly nodded sleepily.

"You should go to sleep." I said, but Lilly began to cry at the moment.

"I cannot sleep without Pingi."

"Hey sweetie doesn't cry - mh. The penguin is doing well,"

"He's gone," Lilly sobbed, "In the water."

"I know, but penguins are damn good swimmers." I said, getting up and grabbing her Pingi. After a wash the penguin lay on the heating in the bathroom. Will wanted Lilly's stuffed animal was ready when she came home.

"You've found him!" Lilly said, taking a bright look. I grinned at the sight of clutching her stuffed animal.

"Sleep well, Lil." I said and wanted to leave the room.

"Daddy can you sleep with me? Please. I don't want to stay alone." Lilly asked softly.

"Daddy?" I muttered overwhelmed. She called me Daddy.

"You're my daddy," Lilly said.

"Yeah sure. But you just called me Jay," I said.

"Can I call you Daddy?" Lilly asked.

"I would love it." I grinned and went to the other side of the bed.

"You're really feverish," I realized as I put my arm around her.

"I'm super cold," Lilly said sleepily, "and everything hurts."

 **CPDCPDCPD**

"Aaaaaaaaaa!" Lilly shrieked, rolling back and forth in bed. It was in the middle of the night.

From her shouting I grew light: "Hey Lilly, sweetie, wake up." I said, trying to stop Lily's strokes. She opened her eyes. She looked at me, shocked. Anxiously she trembled.

"Shh. Lilly. I'm here. It was just a bad nightmare. You're safe." I tried to calm her and put my arm around her.

"Daddy," she whispered relieved.

"I'm here Lilly." I said.

"I'm scared." She whispered.

"Shh. I know. But you don't need to be afraid. I'm right here. I protect you." I whispered.

Lilly whimpered for a long time and snuggled up to me.

"You should sleep a little more," I said gently, stroking her hair. It was just 3 o'clock in the morning.

"I can't sleep anymore," Lilly murmured.

"Shall I read you a story?" I asked.

She nodded and took her penguin. I reached beside me on the night table to get the book and read from it. It was not long and Lilly was sleeping peacefully. I stayed awake for a while and looked at my charming daughter...

The next morning, Will checked again Lilly's body temperature and the old rip fractures. Lilly and I were in bed while Will sat down at the edge of the bed.

"Wow. 39.7 degrees Celsius. We'll have to do something about that, "Will said, rummaging around in his bag. He poured medicine juice and handed her the little cup.

"So please drink." Will said, and gave Lilly the medicine, which she spit out immediately.

"Iiiih. This is disgusting, "she complained.

"It must be," Will said, "Drink up. Please. And remember swallowing not spitting."

He wiped away the spittle. Lilly hesitantly drank her medicine and lay back exhausted in the pillow.

"Lilly do you remember how the rib injuries came?" I asked.

"I don't want to talk." she said.

"Was it an accident or someone hit you?" I said, "You can talk to me about everything. I'm here for you."

"It does not matter." She said.

"No it is not. Please talk with me." I said.

"Jay. Lilly will talk to you when she's ready." Will said, "I'm right little monster?" and Lilly nodded.

"I'll get you something to eat," Will said, and came back a little later with toast.

"I'm not hungry," Lilly said.

"You have to eat something," I said, and Lilly shook her head.

"There is no discussion. Lilly your body needs energy," Will said.

"I don't want to eat anything," Lilly muttered

"Let's share a toast," I said.

"She should eat a bit more than half a toast," Will said.

"Oh really Dr. Halstead? Pass rather on what you say as a house doctor, or you'll get fired." I grinned.

"Call me if you need my help," Will said, leaving us alone.

"You do not really fire Uncle Will?" Lilly asked.

"Don't worry. It was just fun and he knows," I said.

We finally shared more than just a toast. At first it was cumbersome to convince Lilly of the food, but little by little she ate.

As Lilly slept again, I watched Tv in the living room. There was a knock at the apartment door. I opened it and Sergeant Voight entered.

"Morning Halstead,"

"Morning Sarge,"

"How is Lilly?"

"She has a high fever,"

"Then I wish her a good recovery. Your daughter would have to describe the shooter as soon as she is healthy again."

"I know that Lilly is the only witness, but she cannot make any judicial statement. I don't put her in danger."

"Your daughter will only help us. It will not have to make any judicial statement. We keep it anonymous," Voight said, "We searched all the surveillance records for the murderer. Nothing. I've positioned a patrol car outside for safety. Erin said Lilly had seen the Killer that is to say, he saw Lilly."

I ran helplessly through my hair. Yes, of course. Lilly was already in danger.

"We're on it," Voight said, "Halstead. Stay watchful."

 **CPDCPDCPD**

During the day I told Will about the terrible news. Shocked, he stared at me.

"What if he finds out where Lilly is?" Will asked.

"He won't," I said confidently, "Lilly must tell us how he looks so we can identify him. Do you think I can ask Lil?"

"She has a high fever rather hallucinating her instead of giving a description," Will said.

"Still, I can ask her?" I asked for security.

"I cannot tell you." Will and I went to my room.

"Wake up sweetie." I woke the sleeping girl.

"But I am tired and it is so hot" she said.

"We should change her pajamas, as well as the sheets," Will noted as Lilly was soaked with the whole fever.

"Yeah you are right. Lil I carry you into the living room." I said, and picked her up. Will brought me fresh clothes and I helped her change clothes while Will moved the bed again.

"Lil. Do you remember the man who shot Madison?" I asked softly, and she nodded.

"Can you describe him?" I asked, but Lilly showed no reaction. She stared straight ahead. What gave me a yes.

"What skin color did he have?" I asked.

"Purple,"

Will was right. In that condition, Lilly was hardly capable of a description.

"Purple?" I asked, and Lilly nodded sleepily.

"Okay," I said, carrying her back to the newly made bed.

"And were you successful?" Will asked.

"He is purple."

"So not," Will noted.

"Not yet. We have to do something to make her fever fall faster," I said.

"Drink a lot and rest a lot," said Will.

 **Notes**

I do not know what temperature unit you use. So just once again in Fahrenheit:

39,2 degrees Celsius = 102,56 degrees Fahrenheit

39,7 degrees Celsius = 103,46 degrees Fahrenheit

I hope you like the story. And I very much hope that my English is not too bad. ;)

Best regards

lelema


	7. Chapter 7

**Jay POV**

The next day Lilly still had high fever - 39.5 degrees. So it was sinking slowly. I have not received a description of the offender so far.

"You have to drink something." I said, and sat back on the couch. Lilly took the glass of juice and drank.

"Do you feel better?"

"Yeah but I'm bored. Can we do something?"

"What do you want to do?"

"Let's go to the park."

"You're sick. We can go to the park when you are healthy," I said gently, "We can watch a movie."

"Can we watch Air Buddies? Because I love puppies."

"Yeah sure."

We made ourselves comfortable on the couch. We watched the movie and nibble gummibars. Later that evening I wore Lilly back to bed.

Looking out of the window, I saw the patrol car, and I was once more aware of the gravity of the situation. Lilly was not sure, as long as that bastard running around free. The intelligence was on the case. They were currently lighting Madison Turner's life to connect to a suspected perpetrator. But it takes time. Madison lived on the street, and only a few were found in the files. Voight also asked me if I had a description. I said no, or should I say that we are looking for a purple colored suspect?

I sat on the couch and looked at a Blackhawks game while Lilly was sleeping quietly in the bed and Will worked in the emergency room.

Through a loud sound, I jumped like lightning - it sounded like a shot. I snapped at my gun and looked out through the curtains. The door of the patrol car was open wide and the officer lay on the ground.

I quickly closed the door to Lilly's room and leaned quietly against the wall to the apartment door. I held the gun in front of me. I had no time to look for a safe hiding place for Lilly as it was already rustling at the apartment door. The guy was here. Slowly the door opened. I saw the barrel of his gun. I tried to get the gun out of his hand. But he did not let go of the weapon. We fought. I pressed my hand into his face.

I took his hand and hurled the gun away. And I lost my own. He pushed me against the wall and hit me a few times before I hit him in the face and hit him against a shelf. The duel was briefly interrupted by a loud scream. Lilly stood sweaty at the room door.

"Lilly go back into the room!" I shouted, taking the bastard into the shaft. Easily I pushed him away as he hurled me over the small coffee table at the same moment.

"Aaaaa!" Lilly shouted louder. He directed his recovered weapon to my daughter. He held the howling child before him like a protective shield.

"Say good-bye to the child, Detective." He grinned greasy.

"Let the child go or I swear by God I'll kill you," I said calmly, trying to find my weapon.

"In your place, I would let it stay, otherwise the child is dead faster than you think." The guy growled.

Backward walking, he disappeared from the home - with Lilly. I searched for the weapon in the whole disorder and wanted to follow him when I heard shots. No. No. No. Lilly! This cannot be true. He cannot just shoot a child cold-bloodedly.

Abruptly I ran down the hall. Always ready to shoot. Some curious neighbors were lurking through a door gap. I paused. In the entrance of the apartment block, Adam and Erin knelt beside a fearfully trembling child.

"Lilly." I said, relieved, and hurried to them. I squatted down beside my pale child.

"Jay. Lilly is fine," Erin said.

"Daddy. I'm very scared." she whispered.

"I'm here Lilly. Everything will be fine," I said softly.

"We need to get out of here. I have the slightest suspicion that this was not the last attempt," Adam said.

"How did you know ..." I asked questions as Erin already replied: "We push some overtime and then an emergency call came in. We heard your address and we immediately realized that you were in danger. "

"Let's go," Ruzek said. I picked up the trembling sweat bathed feverish child and carried her to the patrol car.

On the trip to the district, which seemed most secure, I chose Voights number and informed him of the incident. Voight was quite beside himself. An attack on my daughter was ultimately an attack on the Intelligence family.

Adam and Erin told me that they caught the guy on the shoulder, so he pushed Lilly to the ground and escaped.

Arriving at the district, I carried my frightened daughter upstairs in the break-room. She stayed on my lap and laid her head on my shoulder. We sat on the couch and waited for Voight and the rest of the team. Meanwhile, Adam and Erin drove back to the apartment to secure evidence.

"Hey sweetie it's all good. You need not be afraid," I said and stroked her back.

"It hurts," Lilly whispered, showing me her left bluish wrist.

"Do we want to cool it?" I asked concerned, and Lilly nodded slightly.

I took an ice pack from the refrigerator, wrapped it in a small towel, and handed it to Lilly. She must have sprained her wrist.

"Everything will be fine sweetie. We're safe now," I whispered in her ear.

"Halstead. How are you? "Voight said.

"I'm fine." I said, wiping the tears with one hand on Lilly's cheek away.

"And you Lilly?" Voight asked gently.

"I'm very scared," Lilly whispered softly.

"Nothing can happen to you. Your daddy and I will protect you. Like everyone else here," Voight promised.

"And when he comes back?" She whimpered, burying her face deeper in my shirt.

"Lilly sweetheart. Everything will be fine. He will not come back so soon. And if he does, I'm here." I said and she nodded slightly.

"Can I speak to you briefly Jay?" Voight asked.

"Daddy stay here," Lilly whispered after I took her off my lap.

"I'm just leaving this door. I'll be right back with you. I Promised," I said, pressing a kiss on her hot forehead.

"The one assigned officer was shot and the other one is in med. The team is looking for usable fingerprints and other notes that lead us to the culprit in your home. Did you perhaps recognize him or is Lilly ready for a statement?" Voight said.

"He was masked, but it was definitely a white man with dark eyes. I think Lilly should rather come to rest and fever she has too." I said.

"I Understand. Stay here for the first time. The apartment is no longer safe. Kim and Atwater are just in the med to inform your brother," said Voight.

"I should have done differently. He had almost kidnapped Lilly and killed her." I said, interrupted by Voight, "Maybe. Jay. You have acted right or did you want to risk your child's life just to grab the bastard?"

I nodded and returned to Lilly after our conversation, where she leaned against me again.

"You know I love you, or Lil?" I said.

"I love you too daddy," she whispered, and I got a light grin.

Insane. Like a child I have known only recently, could transform a whole life. If only a few weeks ago someone said that I had a child, I would probably have laughed at him. Never would I have believed that a child could mean so much to me…

"Hey kiddo. Look at whom I brought you," Ruzek said, bringing her stuffed animal out behind his back.

"Pingi!" Lilly said, stretching the uninjured hand to her penguin, to take him cuddly.

"We've packed a bag with a few things for you," Erin explained.

„Thank you", I said.

"Lexi had often high fever at that age. Meredith then gave her hot baths. "Al said, who came in now.

"Maybe I should still try, if it doesn't get better." I said.

Finally, Sergeant Platt asked to take care of Lilly, so I could be part of the meetings, as the little one did not want to remain alone - understandably.

"What do we have?" Voight asked.

"We have found that Madison Turner was a prostitute. The coroner confirmed that certain injuries to speak for it." Kim said.

"However, we do not know who she worked for," said Atwater.

"It would be possible that her pimp is behind all this," Al said aloud.

"In Jay's apartment we have secured fingerprints and are comparing them to our database." Ruzek said.

"The neighbors say they heard shots. Afterwards a fight, a scream and again shots, which came from us. Nobody saw the perpetrator coming." Erin said.

"The offender is damn good," Kim stated.

"We'll be tracking in any direction, look at surveillance records around Halstead's apartment, I'd like that guy to be in the cage as fast as it gets," said Voight.

"Halstead! The child begins to convulsions!" Platt cried helplessly.

They all hurried into the pause room. Meanwhile Sergeant Platt placed Lilly on the ground. Every single muscle was cramping and her eyes were closed.

"Hey Lil. Wake up. Come on. Wake up! "I shouted in panic and held the cramping child.

"I'll call an ambulance." Ruzek said and was rejected by Al. "Bringing Lilly into the Med is much too risky. She is not sure," Al said.

"I'll call Will," Erin said.

For a feeling eternity I held my cramping child in my arms. Lilly stopped, opened her eyes, and breathed more rapidly.

"It´s okay Lilly." I said, holding my sweat-bathed child.

"Does anyone know how long it took?" Erin asked and put the phone on loud.

"Almost 2 minutes," Platt said.

"I suppose Lilly is soaked." I heard Will's voice at the other end.

"Yes," Al said.

"Is Lilly fully approachable?" Will asked.

"Lilly?" I asked, looking into her staring eyes. It showed no real emotion.

"Rather not so," Ruzek said.

"This is the shock. Someone should re-measure fever." Will said.

Immediately Kim hurried with a fever thermometer. "39.3 degrees," she said.

"How high was her temperature at the last measurement?" Will asked.

"Same high," I said.

"OK. Then it was probably not a spasm, but a fever dream a nightmare. This would also explain her shock. Lilly does not know whether she is dreaming or not," Will explained.

"And now? Must Lilly go to the med?" I asked worried.

"The fever must go down. Give her the medicine and put on their dry clothes. She must first go to the med when the temperature rises quickly or she has a long spasm." Will said.

Meanwhile, Lilly calmed down. Her breathing normalized and she had leaned against my shoulder. She had apparently returned from her dream.

"Okay thanks." I said. Erin hung up the phone call and Voight brought a spoon of medicinal juice.

"Lilly, do you open your mouth for the juice?" Voight asked gently.

She nodded slightly and took the spoon reluctantly.

"It's still disgusting," she said after she swallowed it.

"Can you tell us what you dreamed?" Atwater asked curiously, and Lucy shook her head.

"Come on. Let's dress you dry clothes." I said.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

During the late afternoon Will comes finally over. Since her feverish dream, I longingly wished for my big brother to check Lilly again medically.

"OK. Lilly's breathing sounds better and I find her cold goes back very much. The hand is just sprained," Will said, putting the stethoscope aside.

"And the spasm of this morning?" I asked worried.

"Jay don't worry. Lilly is doing well and her fever has not risen. On the contrary, 39.3 degrees is super. The fever drops," Will said, "Did you hear where we can stay tonight?"

"You can sleep with Natalie," I grinned.

"Would I, but what about you?" Will asked.

"I don't know. I'll find something," I said, and Will nodded.

 **NOTES**

39,5 degrees Celsius = 103,1 degrees Fahrenheit

39,3 degrees Celsius = 102,74 degrees Fahrenheit

Hello :)

I'm planning further chapters.

I know the story begins in Season 4 Episode 17, but I'm not sure if I should write Erin out.

So. Maybe I'd like to change the end at episode 23.

No matter which version is chosen, I will include it in chapter 9 or 10.

 **What version would you like to read?**

 **Or do you have other suggestions?**

 **Your ideas are important to me! Likewise your opinion! :)**

 **Version 1**

Jay and Erin are together again. Maybe Jay asks Erin if she wants to be his wife. And Erin says yes. (So Erin does not go to New York.) Maybe they even found a family.

 **Version 2**

Erin goes to New York. Jay had no more chance to ask her. So just like the episode 23.

 **Let me know and write it down in the comments.**

Bye lelema


	8. Chapter 8

Hey. You still have the option to choose between the two versions from chapter 7. Or make your own suggestion.

I hope you enjoy the chapter. :)

 **CPDCPDCPD**

 **Jay POV**

Since two days I lived with a sick child at my sergeant house. He considered his house to be the best option. There were two detectives at Lilly around the clock. Admittedly, the one I was. Otherwise this changed. Depending on who just had time, because there was no patrol at the door this time.

At the time, Lilly was lying on the couch watching a cartoon series.

"Good luck. You're not so hot anymore," I said, as I joined her and felt on her forehead.

"I'm much better," Lilly said.

"What series we look?" Ruzek asked curiously, sat down with us.

"Bibi and Tina." she replied.

"Do we have to necessarily look at a girls series?" Ruzek asked annoyed.

"We can also paint the nails and make us make-up," Lilly said in the sweet girl's tone. I laughed, I'd like to see Ruzek with make-up.

"Uh. Everything great. Bibi and Tina is my favorite. It's great as the two horses talk to each other," Ruzek said.

With a tougher look, she looked at Ruzek dangerous.

"Did I say something wrong?" Ruzek asked.

"Lilly cannot stand it when you're lying to her," I said.

"W-what?" Ruzek asked insecure.

"Bibi and Tina aren't the horses," I told him, but it was already too late. Lilly grabbed a pillow and threw off Ruzek.

"There's revenge." Ruzek said and the two fighting in Voight's living room. They threw themselves off with pillows or tickled each other. One of them struck down a flower vase that stood on a shelf. However, it did not bother the two and they continued to fight.

At some point Lilly stood still, breathing very flatly.

"Lil everything okay?" I asked worried. After all, she lay with high fever in bed in the last days.

"Hey kiddo?" Ruzek asked.

"I feel dizzy." Lilly stuttered

"Come on," Ruzek said, leading her back to the couch where we lifted her legs.

"It was a bit too much," Ruzek said, and I nodded approvingly.

"Drink a sip," I said, holding an apple juice.

No 10 minutes later, Lilly feel better. The three of us were puzzling how we should report to Voight carefully about the destruction of the antique vase.

"Do you think Voight will snap when he sees the broken vase?" Ruzek asked, uncertain.

"He will not be enthusiastic anyway, I suppose." I replied.

"Cannot we blame Lilly? He cannot fire a child," Ruzek said.

"That's unfair. You were also to blame," Lilly muttered.

"We can just tell him the truth," I said.

"I'm looking for a new job," Ruzek said.

"Why don't we just stick them together?" she asked.

"We don't even know where to fit which part," he said.

"Like puzzling," Lilly said.

In the end, Lilly's suggestion won with the puzzle. The three of us gathered around the dining table and wondered where that part fit. Luckily was not the whole vase destroyed, but only a half.

"I think the shard belongs here or no?" he asked insecure.

"Rather on the other side?" I said.

"Or here," Lilly said.

"So we do not get any further." I grinned.

After a long tinker hour, the vase was largely new.

"Perfect or not?" Ruzek beamed.

"Don't you think that the pattern is not one on top of the other?" I said, looking at the glued vase rather suspiciously.

"He is not the youngest anyway, "Ruzek grinned.

"That was full of fun, we can often break something and then glue together." Lilly said brightly.

Adam and I looked at each other surprisingly, before we saying at the same time, "No."

 **CPDCPDCPD**

It was not long before Ruzek was replaced by Voight. We sat in the living room as he needed Lilly for identification. I hoped that the glamorous antique vase on the shelf, which according to the Internet was expensive, would not attract attention.

"Do you mean Lilly, you can recognize the man?" Voight asked gently.

"I think so." Lilly said.

"Great. Then I'll show you some pictures and you'll know when you recognize him," he said, showing her a collection of possible suspects on the smartphone.

"Stop. He was, but he looks different," Lilly said. The picture showed a white man with black hair and a 3-day beard.

"How did he look different?" He asked.

"He was purple on one side," Lilly said. Instinctively I put my hand flat on her forehead.

"I don't have a high fever," Lilly said, and refused my hand.

"I just wanted to be safe," I muttered.

"Purple? Can you explain to me what you mean? "Voight asked curiously.

"It looked like color on the face, but only on one side," Lilly explained.

"Okay, understand. You were a great help," he said.

"Is that the man who also attacked Dad?" Lilly asked.

Voight and I exchanged brief glances before he said, "Yes, that's the man."

"He shot Maddi too." Lilly said, "How's Maddi?"

"Uh. This man uh ... "I broke the sentence and looked helpless at Voight.

"This man is very bad, so he shot Madison." He said.

"And what does that mean?" Lilly asked confused.

"She doesn't live anymore," I said gently.

"So she's in heaven?" Lilly asked, and I nodded.

"Why was the man at our house? He wanted to take me to her?" Lilly asked softly and snuggled up to me. I stroked her hair.

"Do not worry, Lilly. We are safe here. Nothing can happen to us," I said.

"You've got a super-awesome protective dad, too," Voight said, changing the subject: "Tell me, was the vase always so crooked?"

"It looks like he's not so old yet," Lilly whispered to me and I laughed.

"The vase is slate than the tower in Pisa," Voight said, looking at the vase, "Is that super glue?"

"Sarge. Um. Yes, the vase," I stammered.

"It's fell down," Lilly said.

"Falling down? And since you thought, you sticked together again, because the old does not notice it or what? "Voight said ironically.

"Yes." Lilly grinned, "It was funny."

"After all, the vase looks interesting now," Voight laughed.

"You're not angry?" Lilly asked.

"No not at all. This is just a vase. I do not make much of that. Justin has always been throwing things down as he was at your age." Voight said.

"Who is Justin?" Lilly asked

"Lilly," I said softly. I did not want to push Voight up yet with an explanation who was Justin. It must be painful to lose the own child and be remembered day by day.

"My son." He said.

„Where is he?" she asked.

"He's not here anymore," Voight said, trudging into the kitchen.

Lilly looked at me questioningly.

"He's dead as Maddi." I said softly.

"Why is one dead?" she asked

"Um. Well ... mostly old or very very sick people die. But even younger ones can be killed by an accident or by another person. It's just part of life." I stammered around.

"But you do not die or?" Lilly asked.

"Everyone can die. Plants, animals and us." I said.

"Even me?" Lilly asked.

"Yes," I said.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

Later in the evening I joined Voight in the kitchen. Lilly finally slept and I wanted to be informed about the latest news.

"Do you want a beer?" Voight asked, and I nodded.

"The girl is good for you Halstead." He said.

"Yeah." I said.

"I think you should talk to Erin again."

"Yes, I should," I said, "but first Paul Corey must be behind bars." I said.

Paul Corey is the fleeting man whose fingerprints were secured in the apartment. He was also identified by Lilly. Against Corey there were already arrest warrants because of bankruptcy, smuggling of drugs, as well as serious bodily injury. Only so far he has always been able to escape.

"He would rather not have to mess with us. I do not understand any fun at all," Voight said.

"Apart from Lilly's fever, which she had the last few days, I cannot let her go out or send her to school when a heavy-handed hunter is hunting for her," I said.

"I understand your worries, Jay," Voight said, "I might need a full unit again. Lilly can sit in the break room or at Platt. The fact is, the more man I have, the faster we can bring this Corey behind bars. "

"Okay," I agreed with his suggestion, "If we take this bastard, I want to be alone with him for 5 minutes."

"I think you can do it in 2 minutes."

 **CPDCPDCPD**

"So you can keep you busy in the break room, okay?" I said, and walked with Lilly to the district.

"All day?" She asked.

"Yeah. You can do it, don't you?" I said.

"I'm getting bored now," Lilly said.

"Hello sweetheart. Nice to see you again." Sergeant Platt greeted her happily.

"Oh and me not?" I grinned.

"Ha. Unfortunately, I see you far too often. Detective chuckles," Platt said seriously and disappeared behind her counter.

"Can it be that Trudy does not like you?" Lilly asked as I opened the gate.

"Of course she likes me. We like to make such jokes." I replied.

"Sure?" She asked.

"Hey Mini-Halstead there you are again!" Ruzek said.

"Adam!" Lilly squealed, and they both embraced.

"How are you?" Ruzek asked.

"Good," Lilly beamed.

After the little small talk, Lilly disappeared toward the break room as we pursued our work. Al and Kim were at an informer. Ruzek and Atwater went through video material in the garage and Voight was also on the road - he checked whether this purple color on the face of Corey could come from a robbery that took place just a few weeks ago. So only Erin and I remained behind.

"Lilly really got settling in, despite the circumstances." Erin said, watching through the window a painting Lilly.

"Yes. I think I suffer more from it than she does," I said.

"Children can endure much. More than we think." Erin said, and I nodded.

We checked the finances of Paul Corey and his announcements to find a trace of his whereabouts. Likewise, we took his girlfriend under the magnifying glass - nothing.

"Damn the guy cannot dissolve in air!" I scolded and put the phone on. Thoughtfully I stroked my hair. Erin looked at me questioningly, but before she could say anything, Lilly came out of the break room.

"I'm bored." She quivered and stood beside my desk.

"We're just an hour here," I said.

"Can we do something? For example, we can go to the park," Lilly said.

"That will not do. You know I have to work," I said.

"Can I play on the computer?" Lilly asked.

"I do not think so. I need my computer for work." I said.

"There are others around here," Lilly said, pointing around.

"Lilly. Why do not you paint a picture or read a book?" I asked.

"That's boring." Lilly complained.

"If I am allowed to interfere. Lilly how about a short trip? We could have breakfast," Erin said and Lilly nodded enthusiastically.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

A little later we sat with a breakfast in the diner.

"So Lilly how does it live with your dad?" Erin asked curiously.

"Good," Lucy replied curtly

"Only good?" I asked, sipping my coffee.

"Yes," Lilly replied cheekily.

"Why only good?" I asked curiously.

"The female support is missing," Lilly said.

"Haha. The men's house is probably too chaotic to you, huh?" Erin said.

"No it is not, but neither Dad nor Will can weave braids." Lilly said.

"I give my best." I grinned.

"Still, it does not look good and you can only do the simple one," Lilly said.

"You don't learn it from one day to another." I defended myself.

"I think Jay can do quite well," Erin said, looking at the plait, which was braided a bit too loosely.

At the same moment an emergency call came in via the radio.

"This is just around the corner.", Erin noted, put money on the table and looked at me expectantly.

"And Lilly?" I asked uncertainly, after all, I cannot bring a nearly 7-year-old to a shooting.

"Either she's waiting here or in the car," Erin said.

After a short thought, I thought it was best for Lilly to waiting in the car. After all, this Corey is still at large. Besides, I cannot leave a child alone in a diner.

"You're waiting in the car," I said holding out my private phone, "So that you not bored." Lilly took the mobile phone as Erin turned into the said street of the emergency call.

The emergency call was a shooting in the kiosk. A young man lay bleeding on the ground. Erin secured the area and I took care of the man.

"Everything will be fine. I'm Detective Halstead and you?" I said.

"Tom," he muttered.

"What happened?" I asked, but he lost consciousness.

"Hey. Stay awake. Talk to me," I said.

"His name is Thomas Banks, 21 years old. Student," Erin said, holding a student ID.

No 5 minutes later came the ambulance. Gabby and Brett brought the injured student into the med. They were optimistic that the young man would make it.

"Oh God, Jay. He knew Madison Turner. In the portmonee is a picture of both." She said.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

"What do we know?" Voight asked, with an information exchange with the whole team. Lilly was at the reception with Sergeant Platt.

"Madison Turner and Thomas Banks were step-siblings. About Tom is little known. Father in jail and the mother is drug-dependent. She also married the deceased father of Madison Turner. Tom has a scholarship at Chicago University. No criminal records or other abnormalities," Ruzek said.

"So a true pattern boy." Atwater said.

"If that Thomas had never been involved in anything, why now? Someone wanted to see him dead." Al thought.

"Erin and Atwater, you speak to him as soon as he is able to be heard. Halstead you go through the finances. Ruzek check the phone numbers and profiles. I think we all have Paul Corey in our sights, but we have to prove it, too," said Voight.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

The student's finances were unobtrusive. There was not much to check. He worked in a restaurant to finance his livelihood.

"Halstead. Your daughter is driving me mad," Platt muttered, just climbing the stairs.

"What happened?" I asked.

"Because you do not pay attention because you have to explain the job to the police officer, and your daughter disappears in the next moment," Platt complained.

"What?" I asked.

"Well, you cannot do the job either," Ruzek grinned.

"Watch what you say Ruzek!", Platt exhorts, "Relax Halstead. Your child is quarreling all the time she wants to be on the playground. I just have no representation, so you have to collect your child" Platt said, stamping down the stairs.

"Uii, the monster gets a lot of trouble," Ruzek murmured.

"Ruzek. I'll be right back," I said, making my way to the nearest park. On the playground I saw Lilly from afar. She sat on a swing. I quickly joined her.

"Platt has been looking for you everywhere," I said, leaning against the post of the swing.

"I told her I wanted to go to the playground," Lilly said.

"And ... there you think you can just go without asking me?" I asked and Lilly shrugged.

"Mum has always allowed me to go to the playground." She said.

"Okay. Listen to me Lilly. I know it's boring for you, but you cannot just get away. I'm worried about you," I said

"Sorry," Lilly murmured.

"Promise me that you always tell me where you are going. Understood?" I said.

"Promised," Lilly said.

"Great. By the way, I was talking to Will. After his shift he takes you off and you spend the rest of the day together," I said.

"Really?" she asked.

„Yes"

"That's nice," Lilly said, jumping off the swing.

"Will I get no punishment now?" Lilly asked while we strolled through the park.

"Why?"

"Because I went to the playground without asking."

"Do I have to give you a punishment?"

"No because it always hurts so much."

"What why? Were you beaten for punishment?" I asked horrified.

"Sometimes, but only from him."

"Lilly. I would never hurt you. Also not for punishment."

"Really? Do you promise it?

"Yeah. I promise you." I said, "You can trust me." And she nodded.

"Maybe a small punishment. Sugar ban with Will. The last time you were both almost unbearable." I grinned.

"No sugar shock?" Lilly said horrified and I nodded.

Out of the blue, there were shots on the street. At the same time the passers-by screamed and tried to get to safety. I pulled my rooted daughter behind my back and pulled the gun out of the holder. I shot several times. At the same time I tried to look for cover. With Lilly, I hurried behind a passenger car. At the same time a bullet hit my right shoulder - which Lilly just missed.

"Daddy!" Lilly shrieked.

"Half as bad. Stay down here." I said, straightened up and started firing three shots before I huddled behind the car again. The gunshot wound was aching and complicated the firefight. I pulled out my phone and dialed Voight's number while I fired three shots again - this time I hit him and he went to the ground.

"I'm scared." Lilly cried.

"Hey Lilly. Everything will be alright," I said.

Police officers sounded and the patrol cars parked across the area - including the Intelligence. The CPD was already on the road due to previous emergency calls from the passers-by, and the shooting was only a short distance from the 21st district.

"You're bleeding." She whispered sadly.

"It's all good." I said to calm, "Come here." I gave her a hug, as well as a kiss on the forehead.

Then I took her by the hand and led her to the Intelligence. Fortunately they were not standing near the shooter. I do not know how I met him, but Lilly does not have to see a dead man.

"Halstead. Everything good with you?" Voight asked.

"Yeah we are fine."

"You should go to the med," he said.

"There's even a taxi for you," Atwater said, pointing to the ambulance.

"Thank you, but I can do it myself." I said, reaping evil glances from Voight.

"Jay, you really should be treated. The wound bleeds." Al told me.

"Lilly you can stay with us." Voight said, but Lilly shook her head, "I'll stay with Dad."

With Lilly at my side I strolled to the ambulance - Gabby and Sylvie were waiting longingly for me.

"Would you like a free subscription Halstead?" Gabby asked, "Hey little one. I'm Gabby and you?"

"Lilly.", she whispered.

"Are you okay?" Gabby asked, and Lilly nodded slightly.

"Let's look at your dad." Gabby said and Lilly shrugged.

"Gabby, I'm fine," I said. Sylvie Brett already treated my shot wound at first.

"Smooth shot. Must definitely be examined and sewn in the Med," Sylvie explained.

"So Lilly. First, you place this on the wound and then you put on a bandage," Gabby said, showing it to Lilly.

"So detective. We can go to the med. "Gabby grinned.

Ultimately, Gabby, Lilly and I squatted in the back of the ambulance as Brett drove.

"Have you ever gone with an ambulance?" Gabby asked, and Lilly nodded.

"Really? As a patient? "Gabby asked, and again Lilly nodded.

"What happened?" Gabby asked.

"I have fallen." She said.

"How old were you Lil?" I asked curiously. From the life of my child, I knew only the last three weeks, which made me a little sad. Lilly is a great girl and I would have liked to be there for her sooner.

"It was last year."

"Then you were definitely driven with siren?" Gabby asked, and Lilly nodded.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

In Med I was Wills Patient. There is no worse doctor than his own brother.

"You love dramatic performances, right?" Will asked as he entered the treatment room.

"What else can I say." I replied.

"Lilly. Would you like to buy something to eat? A chocolate bar or something." Will asked, holding her money.

"I got a sugar shock ban," Lilly said.

"Get going Lilly. Buy a snack," I said. Lilly took the money and ran out of the room. If it were to go after her, every meal would consist of chocolate, gummibars, and other sweets. She is a small sugar junkie.

"So you came in a shooting," Will said firmly and sewed the wound.

"The good news is that we can get back to our apartment and Lilly is safe now," I told him.

"And the bad news?" Will asked.

"I was shot in the shoulder... before Lilly's eyes," I replied

"You cannot be left alone,"

"Can you do me a favor? I need Lilly's medical records. I want to know why Lilly has these ribs injuries."

"I'll try it," Will said, "Done. If you wait half an hour, I can drive you. "

"OK. Just like you say it Dr. Halstead." I grinned. At the same moment, Lilly came back with all the sweets.

"Did you spend all the money now?" Will asked in horror.

"You wanted me to buy a snack," Lilly replied.

"A snack and not the vending machine," Will said, bewildered.

"But I did not buy the machine," Lilly said.

"Look at her, Jay. These are your genes that you put into the world." Will said, leaving us alone.

"What did he?" Lilly asked.

"You spent his last twenty dollars on candy." I grinned.

"Oh," Lilly said, "Does that hurt?"

"A bit, but I've got something against the pain," I said.

"Center shocks are really awesome, do you want one?" Lucy asked, "They're like chewing gum, just better."

"Then give it to me." I said. With the acid taste, I pulled my face and watched as Lilly took several of the parts at the same time in the mouth.

"You understand this under awesome?" I said, "You can turn this as reparation to your uncle."

"Okay," Lilly grinned, and asked, "Was Erin your girlfriend?"

"Why?" I asked.

"Well. Erin and you are looking to each other's." She said.

"How do we look at each other?" I asked curiously.

"Just like you fell in love," Lil said.

"And you know that from the many television?" I grinned inquiringly.

"No. Adam said that you were together, but not why you are no longer," Lil said.

"You know between me and Erin it's complicated at the moment," I said.

"And why?" Lilly asked.

"Well. I knew nothing about you and she was disappointed. I was an idiot and did not tell her immediately, but rather asked for a relationship break," I said.

"Then I'm to blame that you're not together anymore?" Lilly asked.

"No you're not to blame. I have it, not you," I said gently.

"Why do not you ask her again?" Lilly asked.

"It's not that simple," I said.

"I think you guys fit together," Lilly said.

"Yes," I said, "You'll get older first," as simple as she imagines the love is not.

"I'll be on Friday," Lilly grinned. Oh God of course. With great concern for her safety, I forgot her birthday.

"And what do you wish?" I asked curiously.

"A puppy, a new drawing pad, colorful pens, a Nintendo 3DS..." Lilly counted.

"So much," I marveled, "Do you want to celebrate with friends or family?"

"I do not know many in Chicago yet," Lilly said.

"Well, maybe you'll meet some friends, you'll go back to school on Monday," I said, "In any case Will and I will be celebrate with you."

At the same moment Will came in. "Absolutely. I love parties." He grinned.

"Do you want a center shock? The taste is best when you take 3 or 4 at the same time," Lilly said in the cute tone. Will accepted her offer and immediately he grimaced.

"Jay instigated you, did not he?" Will and Lilly nodded, grinning.

"Come on. Let's go home." I said.

 **CPDCPDCPDCPD**

Everyday life was finally back. Lilly went back to school. Will pushed one shift after the other and I took the normal work-madness on me again. This Thomas Banks had survived, but was not much help for us at all. He only knew that his step-sister was involved in many machinations and wanted to get off.

"And do you want to celebrate with friends?" I asked on Tuesday. We sat together in front of the TV.

"Maybe." Lilly replied.

"Maybe there is not. Either yes or no," I said.

"What would we do?" Lilly asked.

"What do you want to do?" I asked.

"Zoo or the indoor playground." Lilly said, "And I would invite five friends."

"All right." I grinned.

A look at the clock told me that it was time for her to go to bed. I hurried Lilly in her room and wished her a good night before I joined with a beer back watching TV. I waited for Will, who later came home from his shift in the evening. I told him about the new birthday plans. Skeptically, he looked at me.

"Are you sure Jay? A birthday celebration with 7-year-old monsters?" Will asked, uncertain.

"Sure why not?" I asked

"You want to take care of 6 children and you can do that?" Will asked.

"Will. We're talking about children," I laughed.

"That's why,"

"I can manage it," I assured him, "Besides, you'll be there."

"Um now that you ask, I think I make still an extra shift in Med." Will grinned.

"Come on the children will love you." I grinned.

"I'm only doing it for Lilly," Will said.


	9. Chapter 9

**Lilly POV**

I woke up all by myself this morning, even earlier than usual. Yawning, I rolled over my back and stretched my arms in the air. Today is my birthday, but the funny birthday tingling like how else, I did not feel it today. I felt a strange, empty feeling like a hole. Of course - Mummy will not be there. On the other hand Dad and Uncle Will are there. Do not forget the gifts!

I ran out of my room and saw Dad snoring on the couch. Full of energy I hopped beside him. Dad groaned sleepily and wanted to turn around as I landed with the next jump across him.

"Lilly. It is just a quarter past 5," he mumbled sleepily.

"You have to enjoy every hour of today." I grinned.

"Oh yes? Can it be that on me a cheeky 7-year-old sits?" Dad grinned.

"Maybe." I laughed. Dad launched a tickle attack on me. I simply had no chance against him. Then he took me firmly in the arms.

"I wish you all the best for your 7th birthday. Have a wonderful day, get many nice presents and a lot of fun! I love you sweetie." Dad beamed. He gave me a kiss on the cheek.

"Thanks Daddy," I smiled.

I've always imagined my daddy quite differently, but Jay surpasses all my ideas.

"Do you feel good with 7?" Dad asked, laughing.

"No. Fantastic." I grinned.

"Great. Would you like to wake your uncle?" Dad grinned.

I nodded enthusiastically and stormed into his room. I hopped beside him on the bed and he threw me off with his head pillow.

"Lilly. We have a quarter to six." Will complained tired.

I threw back his pillow and hopped on.

"Lilly. Lie down or there will be no presents. ", Will threatened and I plumped at him.

"Happy birthday little monster." he congratulated me.

"Thank you." I grinned.

"Let's go to the kitchen," Will said.

In the kitchen I marveled at the chocolate cream cake with 7 birthday candles, which stood on the table.

"How did you know that?" I asked.

"Abby told me," Dad said.

"We were in the kitchen last night because of you," Will added.

"Oh yeah. Will almost popped the cake without you," Dad laughed.

"So little monster. Blow out candles and do not forget to wish you something." Will said.

Beaming with joy, I blew my candles - of course with a wish.

"Bravo," Dad grinned.

"What did you wish for?" Will asked.

"You cannot betray that, otherwise it will not be fulfilled." I said.

"But I'm your favorite uncle."

"That's not hard. You are my only uncle."

After pie breakfast there were finally even gifts. From Dad I really got a Nintendo 3DS with two games. Uncle Will gave me the Zoo of Playmobil. Of course, there were still a little smaller gifts - which I like very much.

"Finally, a gift from Abby." Dad said, holding a slightly larger envelope. I eagerly tore open the paper. There was a letter and a silver bracelet.

A bit sad I was already that I had only got one envelope from Mum. Why could not she just come here and celebrate?

I folded the letter and read quietly.

My love Lilly,

I wish you, my little princess, for the seventh birthday all love and many great gifts! I am infinitely sorry that I cannot be there this year. I'm pretty sure you'll have a wonderful birthday.

The little guardian angel will take good care of you!

In Love Mum.

I once again looked at the bracelet, which had two pendants. On the first was my name on it and on the second the angel was depicted. "Come here," Dad said. He put the bracelet around my wrist.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

After school we visited the indoor playground with my five new friends. 2 boys and 3 girls were invited. There were even muffins that Natalie baked. I think Dad and Will were a bit overwhelmed, although it is supposed that they can master stressful situations super because of their profession. Fortunately Natalie supported the two. Her little son, Owen, was there too. Ultimately Dad and Will were toddlers who fought against each other with foam equipment. It was really funny. I even believe that they got game ban from the indoor park.

Later, after the friend's party, Dad, Will, and Natalie took me out to pizza. Adam, Kevin, Kim, Antonio, Erin, Trudy and even Dads Boss also came. On the grounds that they wanted to know how good Dad had been so far. They congratulated me all and there were even more gifts! A new drawing pad and many different colorful pens.

"Natalie has rushed all the children to us," Will complained, showing a bruise on his arm.

"Oh you poor thing." Kim laughed.

"I cannot complain." Dad grinned, who was not actually taken from us apart only because of the gunshot wound. Uncle Will, on the other hand, had to endure us all the time.

"Lilly on a scale from 1 to 10. How good was your birthday?" Antonio asked.

"What is the worst?" I asked, reaping shocked faces of Dad and Uncle Will, who were really trying hard. Everyone could see it.

"One,"

"Uh. Then it was an 11." I grinned.

"Right answer," Dad winked.

"Just an 11? Seven little monsters were lying on me," Uncle Will said.

"That's what happens. I told you from the start, don't mess with this one naughty boy," Natalie said.

Uncle Will had had an endless discussion with one of my invited friends. Samuel wants to become a doctor later and put Will's qualifications into question.

"At first he was nice. I could not guess he was learning karate from a small age." Will said.

"They're just children." Antonio laughed.

„Naughty children." Will said.

"We are not naughty!" I said.

"You were the worst." Will grinned.

"That's not true. Dad has also rushed everyone to you."

"Do I understand this in the right manner. Everyone has allied against me?"

"Yeah. It was funny." Dad said.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

 **Jay POV**

What a day - adrenaline pure. Lilly was like a different person. It made me great pleasure to see that little girl so hyperactive and cheerful. I was a bit sad that I had known her so late. Still, I could not imagine a life without a little girl.

"Let's try calling Abby again." I said. I have tried to reach Abby several times today. I also thought that she congratulated the birthday girl on her own, but she didn't. I put the call out loud, so we both could hear.

"Hello?" Abby said.

"Hi Mommy." Lilly grinned.

"Hey my little princess. I wish you a happy birthday. I wanted to call you, but we have a lot of stress right now and I thought you were already sleeping." Abby said.

"But not today." Lilly said.

"Did you celebrate well?"

"Yes."

"That's good to hear. Did you settle in well? The last time you did not want to stay with Jay."

"I like it here."

"How are you?" Abby asked.

"I'm fine again." Lilly said.

"What do you mean by that?"

At that moment I knew that I had started a fucking mistake. Abby knows nothing of what happened.

And Lilly is in the process of enlightening her. What would have been my job. I suppose I never told Abby, otherwise I would lose Lilly. She has grown so dear to my heart. I cannot let this little girl go.

Antonio has also preached to me that my behavior was not right. Finally, he also wants to know what's with Diego and Eva. And he is right. If Abby comes back in a year and takes Lilly, I would also like to know how Lilly is.

"I had a high fever after I ran away."

"You ran away?"

"Yes. But Dad found me. And then we had to move to his boss because a bad man took me to Maddi and she is in heaven."

I ran a hand through my face. Yes. Now Abby knows pretty much everything.

"Lilly, princess, is Jay also nearby?" Abby asked.

"Yes, he hears everything."

"Abby I'm sorry. I know I should have told it earlier." I stammered.

"So is that true?"

"Yes."

"I do not know what to say." She said.

"I'm sorry Abby. But Lilly is fine now. Nothing bad was happened to her."

"You had only one task and that was to take care of Lilly. I thought as a detective you are capable of doing so." She said angrily

"But Mommy. Dad takes good care of me."

"Princess. Can you please go to bed? I must talk to Jay alone."

"Fine." Lilly said.

This time the conversation was surprisingly quiet, but despite everything, Abby was very angry. I could understand it well. It was my fault, after all. She preached to me that I was incapable. I'm lucky if she does not take Lilly away from me.

"Even the birthday girl has to go to sleep." I said after the phone call with Abby. Lilly lay in bed playing Nintendo.

"Now? I'm a year older, so I should also stay awake an hour longer." She said.

"Yes. We are already past midnight." I said.

"I should not have told her that, right?"

"It would have been my duty to tell Abby about it. But I didn't do it." I said, "It's good that she knows now."

"But you got in trouble?"

"You do not have to worry about me. We clarified everything."

It remained silent for a while. I took the Nintendo, and sat on the edge of the bed. We just looked at each other. Lilly's eyes widened slowly from weariness.

"Good night Lil." I said and gave her a kiss on the forehead.

"Good night daddy." Lilly said tiredly, "It was my best birthday ever."

"I also find" I grinned slightly,

"You are the best." Lilly muttered sleepily.

 **NOTES**

Hello

With a heavy heart I have now decided on a version. In doing so, I have taken into consideration your opinions. It was anything but easy. Because ultimately only one voice made the difference.

 **I hope I will not disappoint you and you stay with me as a faithful reader.**

I wrote a rough action plan for both versions. In doing so, I realized that one could extend the story significantly with a relationship. On the other hand, with a relationship the actual action would also be pushed backwards.

 **So my decision:**

Linstead approaches again.

Then Bunny shows up and Erin goes to New York (Episode 23)

(However, there is the possibility that Erin will return after a while. But does not have to be.)

So I'll continue the plot with easy parallel to the 5th season.

I have chosen this mix now because I really think that the focus is no longer on Jay and his new life as a Daddy. In addition, there is also the possibility that Jay sooner or later (rather later) meet a new girlfriend? But this relationship does not have to be serious and is more likely to be a future. But first we will see a single dad.

Bye lelema


	10. Chapter 10

**Jay POV**

"Dad. Pingi is behind broken here." She sniffed slightly.

"Um. Yeah. Then he would have to the doctor." I just said and Lilly ran to Will in the kitchen.

"Pingi is broken. You have to treat him," Lilly said, holding the cuddly toy.

"I?" Will asked in horror.

"Why did you become a doctor," I grinned.

"Let's see if we can sew him," Will said, checking Lilly's penguin.

"Ui. Looks as if he had eaten something. ", he said. He took out a USB stick out of this small crack. Curiously I looked at this. Even Lilly wondered.

"Let's see what's on it." I said, picking up the laptop.

"You're going to hurt him if you're so brutal with him," Lilly commented.

"My patients have never complained," he said.

"But they get something against the pain," Lilly said.

"Shall I give your penguin serious painkillers?" Will asked ironically.

"Yes," she said.

"Lil. This is a cuddly toy that does not feel pain otherwise we would have discovered the crack earlier." I said. On the USB stick was stored evidence against the criminal machinations of Paul Corey. Madison Turner had probably hid this in the penguin. Therefore, the backpack was probably thrown into the water.

"So. Now Pingi is like new," he said. Joyfully Lilly took her cuddly toy in her arms.

The next day, I told the Intelligence about the fund. Corey himself was dead, but by this evidence and plans of human trafficking, his 'network' could be made flat.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

After a quiet working day Erin and I picked up Lilly from school and drove to the park. Together we walked through the park.

"I think Erin should move in with us." Lilly said, "Or even better, we move to Erin. Because Uncle Will bothers. And I finally want a private room."

"OK. OK. Any other wishes?" I said.

"Yes. Can I go to the playground?" Lilly asked, pointing to the playground about 100 meters away.

I thought for a while, "Yeah, but Lilly please do..."

"Do not run away and don't go with strangers." Lilly finished my sentence. "Exactly. Be careful. " I said and Lilly ran to the playground. Erin and I sat down on a park bench near the playground.

"You are an amazing Dad. She is so happy." Erin said.

"Wow. Erin Lindsay. You've just made me a compliment."

"Do not get used to it."

"What do you think about Lilly's suggestion?" I asked.

"I don't know."

"Come on. What do you think?"

Before Erin could answer, we were disturbed by a woman. "Erin Lindsay? That's a pleasure to see you again," said the woman in her early 30s and pushed a stroller.

"Oh. Hey Alice." Erin greeted her with a forced smile.

"Do not you want to introduce us to each other?" She asked.

"Uh yes so Jay, this is my old classmate Alice. Alice, this is my partner Jay." Erin said

"Hello." We greeted each other

"I became a mother 3 months ago. A little boy, Jeremy, and next month, I'll marry. He is an entrepren... " She said.

"Daddy." Lilly called inadvertently between them and came running to us. "I'm thirsty," she said breathlessly.

"Here," I said, handing her a bottle. After a few times without a water bottle in the park, I learned to bring something because children can be exhausted pretty much.

"Oh. I didn't know you had a child. She looks very much like you. "Alice said, looking at Erin with big surprising implausible eyes. Lilly probably noticed that as she drank her drink. However, Lilly does not look like Erin at all. Both are completely different.

"Yes um, she is n...", Erin wanted to put right as Lilly interjected between them: "Mom, come you with me to the playground?" With this reaction of Lilly, I never expected. She seriously called Erin as her Mum... Shocked, we both looked at Lilly.

"Of course Lil," Erin said irritated. She was probably thinking the same thing "Where did you stop?" Erin asked her classmate.

"Oh nothing. I have to keep going. Bye," she said almost stunned.

"Mum, so?" I asked.

Lilly grinned, "It will not be a habit. Once and never again."

"You have a free wish." Erin laughed.

"I want a puppy."

"No puppy." I said.

"But I have a free wish."

"Yeah. But no puppy." I said "Maybe when you are older."

"So next year for my birthday?"

"I did not say when. It's best to invite her to a scoop of ice cream," I grinned.

"Alright. Then there will be ice cream afterwards." Erin said.

"And you guys should take a room together." Lilly grinned.

"W-What?" Erin said horrified.

"Don't get cheeky." I said.

"I'm always," Lilly said

"Oh yes? Who did you get that from?" I asked curiously.

"I'm a Halstead," she replied cheekily, we laughed and I grabbed my little girl and tickled her a bit.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

A few days later. Impatiently I waited in the emergency room for news as to whether the man from Bunny's apartment survived the operation. Dr. Choi came and told me that the man does not make it.

"Will. I want you to give me the key to mom's safety deposit box. I'm gonna ask Erin to marry me. She is all I think about and she has been there for me every step of the way." I said.

"Why now? You two aren't even together, are you?" Will asked.

"No were not. But she's in real trouble right now, and I want to be there for her. I blew it once, but I'm ready."

"Jay, this girl doesn't want to be saved. Okay, what you should be doing is putting some distance there." Will simply did not understand me. During the day he brought the ring.

My last chance to ask Erin I missed. In the evening, I waited for her in Mollys. The new colleague detective Upton was also there. Kevin, Adam and Will too. My calls ignored Erin. It was too late. Through Voight, I learned that Erin accepted a job offer in New York. She was gone. She left no message. Not a single message. She has not even said goodbye. Like she just wanted to get away from here as fast as she could. I tried to reach her a few more times. But she never took off. She did not answer a single SMS or email. That was it. My love is up and away.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

Three evenings later I sat with a beer in my hand in front of the TV and watched the Blackhawks game. I could not believe it. I was upset. My life changed quickly and Erin is gone. I'm glad that my daughter is with me. It's amazing how much she cares about me, even though it has to be the other way round. Lilly brings me through playing together on completely different thoughts.

A little later Lilly stood before me. "Can we see this." Lilly pointed to a movie in the TV program guide.

"Now?" I asked.

"I want to see the movie," Lilly said, holding the magazine directly to me.

"Alice in Wonderland." I read aloud. No, please, not a child's film, I thought quietly. Children's movies are times great looking, but in the long run quite annoying. The worst of all are the typical girl movies I had to see with Lilly - Frozen and Princess Lillifee.

"You can see the repetition tomorrow afternoon," I said, glancing at tomorrow's agenda.

"I'm bored now," Lilly countered.

"Play Nintendo." I said.

Lilly shook her head and stood directly in front of the TV.

"But you don't want to stay there the whole evening?" I asked.

"Yes," Lilly said.

"You can read, paint, play ... would you like to play a game on the laptop?" I asked.

"Nope," Lilly said, still blocking the view.

"Come sit down." I said to Lilly to get her away.

"Nope,"

"OK. Then turn around and commenting the game." I said.

"Nope."

"Are you naughty now?" I asked, raising my eyebrow.

"Nope."

"Can you say something else?" I asked, grinning.

"Nope."

"Well wait." I said, stood up and started a tickling attack. We laughed and in a brief moment of carelessness Lilly got the remote. I tried to get it back. Between us stood a coffee table and a couch. We exchanged the seats and I blocked Lilly's view on the screen now. In the meantime Lilly, who was standing behind the couch, has found her film.

"You stand in the way." Lilly complained.

"You did that, too," I grinned. Even if I would have loved to see the Blackhawks game, I had fun to annoying Lilly. Sometimes, I think, she realized that I was not feeling well and she wanted to change my mind with such jokes.

"Sit down again," Lilly suggested.

"When I get the remote," I said.

"If you do not leave, we'll have to see that twice." Lilly threatened.

"Not at all or do you see anything about the movie?" I grinned.

"Ice hockey is boring." Lilly whined.

"Oh yes? You've never seen a game completely," I said.

"And you've never seen Alice in Wonderland," Lilly said.

It was already amusing to see how I took a step to the right and Lilly immediately followed a step in the opposite direction.

"Right. A movie can be also seen the next day, a game not," I said.

"You should not see the results, otherwise it will be even more boring."

"Come Lilly. It was quite funny, but let me see the game and tomorrow you decide the program." I said.

„Nope."

I took another step to get in front of the small living room table. She also took further steps. I made a quick movement, grabbed Lilly by the arm and she dropped to the ground. She protected the remote control as if were keeping her life from it.

"Lilly. It's enough," I said, taking the remote.

"This is unfair," Lilly muttered.

"So life is. You've missed the first half hour of the movie. Tomorrow you can see the whole movie," I said, switching back to the game.

Lilly remained quietly sitting next to me. She also took my mobile phone and played Subway Surf.

"You really liked Erin right?" she asked and I nodded.

"And she likes you too, right?" she asked and I shrugged the shoulders. If Erin loves me, why does not she answer? On the one day in the park we are like a little perfect family.

"If I'm not worried, do not worry. I do not like when you are unhappy. You need more fun." Lilly said.

"I am not unhappy. I have you. I just have to think a bit, that's all."

"Then it's good." Lilly said and began to comment on the Blackhawks game completely pointless.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

Three months have passed since Lilly lived with me. Fortunately, Will moved out of his apartment to contract with Natalie. So Lilly and I were able to spread out in the apartment. I moved to my old room and Lilly got Will's room because it was bigger. Kim and Natalie helped us to design a beautiful girl's room.

I sat at my desk. By the last case, a lot of paperwork accumulated, which I worked now.

"Halstead. You have a visitor," Platt said. I looked up from my work and saw Abby.

"Abby, what are you doing here?" I asked in surprise.

"I'm here to get Lilly home," Abby said

"W-what? You cannot just take her with you now," I said.

"Oh yes Jay. I can and I'll take Lilly with me," Abby said.

"Why so suddenly?" I asked curiously. I'm not ready to let that little girl go. Not now where we understand each other so well.

"Do you really think I will leave my child with you for longer than necessary? She ran away from you and was almost killed by a murderer." She hissed

"Um. I can explain that ... "I stammered.

"Spare me the explanation. I still have Lilly's custody, meaning she will still come with me today." Abby said.

"If I am allowed to interfere. Should not Lilly decide who she wants to live with, or when she goes back to Philadelphia? "Ruzek said.

"I agree with that. You guys cannot kick Lilly back and forth like a ball," Kevin said.

"No one asked for their opinion," Abby said, "I'll pick up Lilly at about 5pm." Then she disappeared down the stairs.

I glanced at her, shocked. Atwater, Ruzek and Kim were excited about the rest of their working hours. But ultimately, Abby belonged custody and Lilly will be glad to see her mum again...

 **CPDCPDCPD**

"Dad. Why are you picking me up?" Lilly asked. Voight gave me the half day free to take leave of Lil.

"Um. Because... Abby is picking you up today." I finally said. I did not want to talk about it. Lilly will find out early enough what it´s going on.

"Mum is back?" Lilly asked. The joy could be clearly recognized in her.

"Yes."

"That's nice."

At home, Lilly waited impatiently for her mum. We played a game together before I started packing her clothes in the travel bag.

"Why do you pack my things together?" Lilly asked.

"Abby wants to take you home," I replied curtly.

"But here is my home now," she said. I smiled sadly. She was right.

"I know, but your mum misses you," I said.

"Then she should move in here, too," Lilly said.

"That won't do. Abby and I... that doesn't work." I said.

Shortly there was a knock on the door. I opened the door. Abby and a man stepped inside.

"Lilly!" She was happy and took her daughter in the arm. Lilly seemed not at all happy to see the man. She was in shock.

"I missed you Princess," she said.

"I do, too," Lilly whispered.

"Everything packed? The taxi is waiting." He said, and I handed him the travel bag.

"But ... but I do not want to leave," Lilly sniffed, "I want to stay with dad."

"Oh Lilly. Your friends are waiting and not to forget Grandma," she said

"Here I have friends and Dad and Uncle Will and Kim and Adam and Natalie..."

"OK. I understand. You've met new friends. Can we go now?" he said annoyed.

"I will not come with you. Not as long as he lives with us." Lilly said, crossing her arms.

"Lilly stops. He never did anything to you. You should finally respect that he belongs to our life. And you will live with him." Abby said.

"No way. I will stay here. Please," Lilly howled, "Daddy do something about it."

"Um. Abby. Think about it again. Lilly can live here. Do you really want to tear her out of her environment?" I said, "She doesn't seem to be thrilled to see your boyfriend."

"Stay out of there Jay. This is not your business." She said.

"I guess so. My daughter is unhappy in his environment. I also know her medical records. She was very frequent in the emergency room. I think he knows what I'm getting at."

"That's totally ridiculous. Lilly come let's go." She said.

"NO!"she screamed.

"Abby. Please think about it." I said.

"Jay. You represent a danger to our daughter. I should never have brought her here." She said.

"But I ran away. Dad did not know about it." Lilly said.

"Lilly is enough. You will come with us." Abby said.

"But I want to stay here!" Lilly said.

"Lilly. I promise you that we visit us during the holidays." I said, and squatted down to her height.

"I want to stay here," Lilly howled.

"I know. Come here sweetie." I said, taking her in my arms.

"You can always come here. Please don't let everything to you. I'll do something about it. I Promise you." I whispered in her ear, pressing a last kiss on her forehead.

"I love you Daddy." Lilly cried, "I'll miss you terribly."

"I love you and I miss you, too," I whispered. We parted from the embrace and Abby reached for Lilly's hand.

"Finally," he moaned.

"Goodbye Jay," she said.

"Bye daddy," Lilly cried.

"Goodbye sweetie," I said.


	11. Chapter 11

**Jay POV**

The days without my little girl were unfamiliar. On the other hand, I had my usual freedom back, on the other hand I knew with this nothing to start. For a brief moment, I thought, my luck is complete. But I was deceived. Not only my girlfriend is gone, but also my daughter. She has brought so much life and chaos into my life that I would not want to do without. Her smile. Her cheerful nature. Her impudence. I miss all of that. The apartment was just too quiet without her. Nowhere were more toys around. No kid that wants to dictate the TV program. The apartment was just lonely and abandoned as well as me. When it comes to Abby, I never see my daughter again. I'm a risk to the child, even though she is.

At Mollys, my friends were very upset. It's irresponsible what Abby does. She tore her daughter out of her new familiar environment. All against her will. Lilly was happy with me, although there were some initial difficulties. She wanted to stay with me. She did not want to go with Abby and her boyfriend. But ultimately, adults do not care about what their kids want. We always think that this is the best for the child. Granted, I'm not a perfect dad and Lilly ran away, but I'm worried about the kid. I'm there for her and she can count on me if she needs my help. In that case she needed it urgently. My suspicion that Lilly was beaten was almost confirmed.

"What will you do now?" Kim asked

"I am looking for an attorney and I will challenge the custody." I said.

"I know a very good lawyer. Martin Cox. You should call him." Antonio said.

"In this medical record is it surely a child endangerment." Ruzek said.

"Show it to me. Different bruises, broken ribs, place wound and 2 times the same arm broken. Every time he was with her in the emergency room. Unbelievable. Abby plays with it?" Antonio said.

"Either she is blinded by love or she knows nothing about it." I said.

"Don't get in there too much Jay. These injuries can have a simple explanation." Al said.

"It does not look like that to me. Lilly was shocked to see him." I said.

"A custody battle can lead to fatal consequences. Be careful of such allegations if you want to be a part of your daughter's life." Al said.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

I had visited the recommended lawyer the next day. In the afternoon at work I told my colleagues about it.

"So, how are the chances?" Kim asked.

"Hard to say. It depends on how much Abby has against me in the hand." I replied.

"Let's be honest, what should they have big against you, why doesn't Lilly live with you?" Kevin asked.

"That can be a lot," I said.

Yes there really comes a lot together. The thing with the suspended head money. The posttraumatic stress disorder from the time of the Army. And generally the fact that I am a cop and theoretically always work.

"Jay. Do not rack your head about it," Voight said, "The court will also see that Lilly does not live in the best environment at Abby. Her ex-boyfriend with whom she is back together obviously hurts the child."

"Has Lilly a right to be heard, too?" Adam asked.

"In exceptional cases, yes. However, the court does not take the opinion of a child seriously, if the evidence in spite of everything speaks against it," I said, "And to be honest, I do not want Lilly involved."

"But in that case it is clear that Lilly is beaten or?" Kevin said.

"For us already. But explain this a court," Kim said.

"I would not have let Lilly go. Perhaps she is beaten by him at this moment." I said.

"You had no choice Halstead." Voight said, "Win for Lilly the guardianship."

 **CPDCPDCPD**

The days went by quickly. I was able to develop a strategy with my lawyer, but apart from the suspicion of endangering the child, we have nothing against them, while they probably already have a whole book against me. The hearing will take place in Chicago as Abby and her boyfriend stayed in town for another weeks. Furthermore, Abby would like to move away with Lilly.

Outside the courtroom my lawyer, Martin Cox, received me.

"Good morning, Mr. Halstead," he greeted me.

"Morning," I said.

"No reason to panic. The court will see today that there is only one true home for Lilly." Cox said.

Abby, her boyfriend and their lawyer were already waiting in the courtroom. A little later, the judge came and opened the trial. She read the accusation loudly and then we had to swear under perjury to tell the truth in court.

"In the witness stand the accused Mrs. Abby McSweeney is called." The judge announced and she sat down in the witness box. Her lawyer began to ask questions.

"Mrs. McSweeney. Your daughter only lived with you for the first few years? "He asked.

"Yes that's correct." She said.

"You decided shortly before Lilly's 7th birthday that she should meet her father, Mr. Halstead. With what reason?" He asked.

"She should know who her father is. In addition, Alex and I separated shortly before and I did not know where to go with the child. I'm in the army and mostly overseas."

"Understand. Was Lilly unhappy in her surroundings?" he asked

"No. She is a happy child." She said

"How did Lilly's injuries come about? Mr. Halstead suspects your boyfriend."

"Lilly fell from the climbing frame on the playground. She had a rib fracture, a broken arm and a place wound on the forehead."

"So it was an accident?"

"Yes. Alex immediately took Lilly to the hospital, where she had to stay for a while."

"So the charge of child endangerment is not right?"

"I see no reason why Lilly should be endangered with me. She is my little girl."

"Ok. How did you react when you found out that your daughter had run away and a murderer was chasing her?"

"I was horrified. Stunned. I only asked Jay for one thing to take good care of Lilly and none 2 weeks later the child was in big danger."

"Mr. Halstead does not care about the child in your opinion?"

"It may be that he gives his best. But he is not made to take care of a child. "

"Thanks," he said and my lawyer stepped forward.

"Mrs. McSweeney. How did your daughter react when she wanted to pick her up?" Cox asked

"She was howling. She wanted to stay with her father."

"It's strange you don't find it? You were there for your daughter for the first 7 years. But she seems to like her father better."

"She is a child. She is currently raving about her father. Which is no wonder after all they have only known each other for a few months."

"Good that you say it. Why did you never tell Mr. Halstead about the child's existence?"

"Because I coped well without him. I did not know if he wanted a child. One should not forget his former psyche."

"Do not you think Mr. Halstead was there for the kid? Another question. The child's medical record states that she broke her arm twice. Did she crash twice during play?"

"Lilly is very hyperactive. The poor one was already broken by the fall and instead of protecting it, the child jumped around at home and fell off the sofa."

"Were you there?"

"No, but my boyfriend. He told me how it happened. Do not you think I'm not worried? "

"Funny that the child is hurt only in the presence of your boyfriend. Does Lilly like your boyfriend?"

"No. She has problems accepting him."

"Why?"

"Because Alex is not her father. At least that's her reason."

"There the child is right. Mr. Jay Halstead is father, according to paternity test. Has Lilly asked for her father earlier?"

"Yes."

"What did you tell her?"

"That he will not be part of our lives."

"And Lilly accepted that?"

"No. She began to fantasize and tried to imagine what her father was like. "

"Did Lilly know that she could meet her father that day?"

"Yes."

"How did she react?"

"She asked me questions. How we met, why she's getting to know him now or how he is."

"So she was happy?"

"Yes. She was very curious."

"And you thought it would be better to send the child to the father by taxi?"

"I was late. My flight was not waiting. "

"You know that was irresponsible to send a seven-year-old by taxi through a foreign city."

"Nothing happened to her."

"Luckily," Cox said, "Thanks. I have no further questions"

Abby sat back in her seat while I was called to the witness stand.

"Mr. Halstead. You met Mrs. McSweeney in a bar for divorce papers right?" Cox began the questioning.

"Yes," I answered.

"But Mrs. McSweeney tells you about the child's existence right?" Cox asked.

"Yes. I did not know anything about my child," I answered curtly.

"What was your reaction? After all, your life changed. "

"I was speechless and suspicious. I wanted to make sure it was really my kid. "

"So you requested a DNA sample from the child."

"Yes and after 2 days I had a positive result."

"Did you look forward to it?"

"I was overwhelmed, but yes."

"How was your first meeting?"

"Lilly was at the door. Alone. At first she was very shy and we had to establish a relationship with each other. It took a few days until we had a routine. For both of us it was unusual. But after a week we were a good team."

"Your brother William Halstead supported you correctly?"

"Yes. I have a time-consuming job as a detective, so he helped me out."

"And Lilly was doing really well in time?"

"Yes. We were in the zoo or water park. I love spending time with her."

"How did you feel when Lilly disappeared?"

"Dreadful. I felt guilty. I searched for her all the time."

"How did you hear about Lilly's previous injuries?"

"After we found her. Dr. Manning told me that Lilly had an old, unhealed rib fracture. The second time Lilly had gone to a playground without asking. She thought I would punish her with blows. She said it always hurts so much."

"That's quite a reason to file a child-risk charge. Especially as the child speaks of blows. You are very worried about Lilly's well-being, right? "Cox asked.

"Yes. She is the most important. I just want Lilly to be happy, so am I. ", I replied.

"Thank you Mr. Halstead. I have no further questions." Cox said, and cleared the way for the lawyer of Abby.

"Mr. Halstead. It's all well and good what you said. Only we are talking here about the safety of the child. You served in the army?" Baxter asked.

"Yeah right. 3rd Battalion 75th Ranger Regiment stationed in Afghanistan." I replied.

"During this time, you got to know each other. The child was conceived during a one night stand. You were both drunk. Why are not you in the army anymore?"

"Objection!" Cox shouted.

"Rejected!" Cried the judge, who apparently also wanted to know the other reason.

"I have returned due to post-traumatic stress disorder." I replied succinctly.

"And then you can look after a child? Despite the supposed nightmares?" Baxter asked suspiciously.

"Yes. Listen, I had been through a lot, came home and got my life under control again. That's 8 years ago. I am perfectly capable of looking after a child," I said curtly.

"Apparently not. Why did your daughter run away? Explain to me please, Mr. Halstead how it could come to that." Baxter said.

"Lilly heard a phone conversation with Abby. I blamed her for putting a child on me. I was angry with her. But just because I would like to have been there for the child earlier. I thought Lilly was sleeping," I said curtly.

"You as a cop did not realize your child disappeared during the night?" Baxter asked.

"Objection! Mr. Halstead could not know that the child was listening to the conversation and getting rid of it." Cox shouted.

"Granted," said the judge.

"Let's come to another question. Why did not you tell the mother about the disappearance of the child?" Baxter asked.

"I was hoping to find the kid quickly. I don't want to lose Lilly. I want to be a part of my daughter's life." I said.

"Change of subject. A bounty was put on you, right?" Baxter asked.

"Objection!" Cox shouted.

"Rejected," said the judge

"Yes," I answered.

"The life of your daughter could have been endangered. Lucky you didn't know each other yet. What else would you have done? "Baxter asked.

"I would have taken Lilly in personal protection. Nothing would have happened to her. They wanted me." I said.

"Personal protection only works unfortunately not so good. Otherwise, Lilly would not have been kidnapped almost. Mr. Halstead in you I see no great danger to Lilly. You are working like many other fathers, only the difference is that the children do not live in constant danger with other fathers. If an indictment of child endangerment would be an option, it would be up to you. I have no further questions." Baxter said.

I sat next to my lawyer and Abby's boyfriend was called to the witness stand.

"Mr. Alexander Parker, so you are the boyfriend of Mrs. McSweeney. How long have you known each other?" Baxter asked.

"Yes. We have known each other for 2 years."

"Do you know Lilly just as long?"

"Yes."

"What is your relationship with the child?"

"I like spending time with her. We are almost like father and daughter."

"So you deny having beaten child?"

"Yes. We all want Lilly to grow up well protected."

"Do you think Mr. Halstead does not honor this commitment?" Baxter asked.

"He is not a bad father in that sense, only Lilly has earned stability in everyday life. If Lilly has to live in constant fear because of her father's job, I think Mr. Halstead is unsuited to guardianship."

"Objection." Cox said.

"Reason?" asked the judge.

"Children disappear tragically almost every day. Lilly could have lived with her mum as well. There is no guarantee that the child will come home at the end of the day. No matter where the child lives." Cox said.

"Granted," said the judges.

"Has Lilly behaved strangely to you?" Baxter asked.

"Lilly does not want to accept that I belong in her life. She has a flourishing imagination."

"So you think the kid lied about the beatings?"

"It would be possible."

"No further questions," Baxter said, leaving Cox in command.

"Mr. Parker. Here you are under the obligation to tell the truth and only the truth. Why did Lilly's accidents happen during your oversight?"

"I was often alone with Lilly. And I let her run around a lot. She loves the movement and then you can get hurt."

"Only that Lilly hurt herself only in your presence. Furthermore, the doctors cannot arrange some injuries. It could have been blows as a cause in question."

"That is ridiculous. I do not hit children."

"Why is Lilly afraid of you then?"

"The child is sometimes very shy."

"So shy she still does not trust you after 2 years?"

"I almost take on the role of father in her life. Of course she does not like me. Especially now that she knows her biological father. "

"No further questions," Cox said, ending the survey.

The judge murmured for a while with the procedural advisor.

"Mrs. McSweeney in what condition is your daughter currently?" the judge asked

"She's fine," she said.

"I would like to get a picture of the child myself. The trials will continue at the same time in 2 days. A person from the youth welfare office will stand aside Lilly Rose Halstead." The judge ended the negotiations.


	12. Chapter 12

**Jay POV**

2 days later we sat back in our seats in the courtroom. The judge opened the second session.

"In the witness box, 7-year-old Lilly Rose Halstead is called, since she is underage, she is not under perjury. The lawyers are asked not to express any unpleasant questions or statements in front of the child. After questioning the child, they have enough time to express their concerns and findings," said the judge.

At Cox, I knew he would not ask unpleasant questions. I spoke with him, which questions you could probably ask and which one should not ask. I was not so sure about Baxter. A social worker accompanied Lilly to the witness stand and sat down next to her. She whispered in Lilly's ear, whereupon she nodded.

"Mr. Cox would you like to start?" Asked the judge. Mr. Cox got up and stepped forward.

"Hello Lilly. I am Martin. How are you? "Cox asked.

"Good." Lilly said shyly.

"That pleases me. Pretty big this room, right? "Cox said.

Lilly nodded shyly.

"I heard that you were allowed to live with your father for a while."

Lily nodded.

"Would you please tell us what you guys did?" Cox asked softly.

"We have made many trips to the zoo or the park. Dad even taught me to swim," Lilly said.

"That sounds like a lot of fun. Since you can be really jealous. Did you dare to jump off the diving tower?" Cox asked.

"Will and Dad did it and said it was not bad and then Will put me on the board and Daddy was waiting in the water," Lilly said

"You are pretty brave. Are you happy with your dad?" Cox asked sensitively.

"Yes," said Lilly.

"Even if he has to work longer?" Cox asked.

Lilly nodded.

"Lilly. What have you done with your mum? "Cox asked.

"If she had time, we went to the park or went shopping."

"Did she play with you on the playground or something?" Cox asked.

"No, she was just on the phone."

"Do you like your mum's boyfriend?"

Lilly shook her head.

"And why not?"

Lilly was silent.

"You can tell the truth here. Nothing will happen to you. "

Lilly was silent.

"Lilly, would you like to tell us how you hurt yourself last year?"

"I fall down the stairs."

"Really?"

Lilly nodded. Now the judge was listening. Lilly's statement was not the same as that of the adults.

"How did this happen?"

"I cannot talk about it." She said.

"Yes you can. You can say everything here. We only want to help you."

"I was naughty and then he grabbed me." She whispered.

"He?" Cox asked, pointing to Alexander Parker.

Lilly nodded shyly.

"What happened then?"

"He pushed me down the stairs." She said shyly

"Did that happen only once?"

"No." she whispered

"Thank you, Lilly. I have no further questions for you." Cox said and Baxter stepped forward.

"Hello Lilly. I'm Darren Baxter, representing your mum's interests ... can you tell us a normal routine at your dad?" Baxter said, trying to sound friendly.

"Dad wakes me up in the morning, then I get dressed, then breakfast, then he drives me to school, then I'm in school until Will, Dad or the neighbor picks me up, then we go home or on a playground or somewhere else, then we eat at home. Then we play until I have to go to bed.", Lilly slowly said.

"OK. So therefore to except morning and evening you see him hardly. Surely you know what your dad is doing for a living? "He asked.

Lilly nodded. "He's a cop."

"Do you know the duties of a cop?" He asked.

"They arrest the bad people so we're safe."

"Yes. You probably know that this job is very dangerous and takes a lot of time. How long have you had to spend with the neighbor or your uncle, and how often does it happen? "Baxter said.

Lilly was silent. The social worker whispered to her. Sometimes Lilly nodded or shook her head.

"Mr. Baxter, an exact time as you asked, we cannot give unfortunately. However, Lilly said that sometimes she did not see her dad for 2 days. It also varies in frequency. Sometimes more, sometimes less." The social worker said.

"Lilly why did you run away?" Baxter said

"Because I thought Dad didn't want me."

"You have experienced a lot. For days through the cold of Chicago. You met an outlier who was murdered. Did you feel scared at that moment?"

"Mr. Baxter asks another question," the judge warned.

"Alright. Is it true that you were almost shot? "

"Mr. Baxter asks another question." the social worker said.

"Did your father incite you to claim that Alexander Parker hit you?"

Lilly shook her head.

"For sure? I mean both want your custody. It may well be that your father, who is a filthy cop, has instigated you."

"Watch what you say, Mr. Baxter!" The judge reminded again.

"Nobody instigated me!" Lilly shouted.

"Why are you accusing your mother's boyfriend of beating you?" Baxter said angrily. He was admonished by Cox, the social worker and the judge.

"Mr. Baxter!" The judge admonished angrily.

I looked to Lilly, who did not know what is happening. The tears came out of her. I stood up and walked past Baxter, but he said: "Mr. Halstead. Take a seat again. Mr. Halstead. We are in the middle of an interview."

I did not listen to that idiot. I wanted to hit him the face at this moment. Of course I did not do it. How can he ask Lilly just such questions? Does he have no compassion? Why did Abby even allow these questions?

"Hey Lil, do not cry. Everything will be fine. Do we want to go out there?" I whispered and picked up my crying daughter.

"She won't answer any further questions." I said and wanted to carry Lilly out when the judge said, "Mr. Halstead. I understand your concerns and your daughter will not have to answer any questions. So you can sit down relaxed. Mrs. Summer will look after Lilly Rose outside."

"Excuse me, your honor, but my daughter doesn't need a social worker. She needs her parents. I'll leave this room with her, whether you like it or not," I said, carrying Lilly out of the hall, followed by the social worker. Kim, who was waiting outside, came to us immediately. Kim came with me because she wanted to support me. In addition, Lilly likes Kim very much because she can weave very good braids.

"Jay... Lilly. What happened?" Kim asked, discovering the tear-stained face of Lilly.

"I thought unpleasant questions are not asked?" I said irritably.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Halstead. I could not know with what questions Mr. Baxter will arrive," she said.

"You should have stopped the questioning when he started it," I complained.

"Lilly. Baby girl. It's okay." Abby said, who also came out now, "You have no right to take Lilly out." she hissed.

"All calm down. They should go back in." the social worker said, "I'll stay here with Lilly."

"As you wish." Abby said and went back inside. Of course she wanted to leave a brilliant impression. But as a good mother, Abby should have stayed with her daughter outside. If I am a bad dad due to the fact that I stopped the questioning because my daughter started to cry, then it does not matter anymore.

I left the courthouse with Kim and Lilly. We sat on the steps near the entrance. The social worker also left us in peace.

"Hey, sweetie, you were awesome. You answered the questions nicely," I said, "This Baxter has no idea..." I wanted to calm Lilly as she interrupted me: "He's a motherfucker."

"Wow ... Lilly Rose Halstead, who did you learn that from?" I asked in surprise.

"May I not say that? Uncle Will once said that to someone," Lilly said in a cute I-am-innocent-tone.

"I could not have described this idiot any better ... just do me a favor and don't catch every word on what your uncle Will says, okay?" I said, "I guess I have to talk to him a little bit."

I think it's definitely not good that Lilly picks up on swearwords and that of Will, on the other hand, it has somehow fit. Lilly is 7 and not stupid. She has noticed how Baxter wanted to portray me badly and the memories of the murder of Maddi came up again. Furthermore, he didn't believe Lilly with her statement that she was beaten.

"Lilly. Just don't say that word to other people's presence, okay?" Kim said.

Lilly nodded. At the same moment Cox left the building.

"Mr. Halstead good that I meet you. The lawyers and the judge will discuss the case with each other and give you a written answer." Cox said

"Mr. Cox be honest, what are my chances?" I asked.

"Many factors will play a role in the decision. Mr. Baxter has just raised your PTSD and raised the concern of raising a child. Honestly. It doesn't look good or bad. The court has just seen how well you look after your child and also heard of Lilly herself. In addition, Lilly testified to being beaten by Parker. The court takes this incident very seriously. We just have to wait and see," Cox said.

"What if Jay doesn't get custody, can we bring charges again?" Kim asked.

"Yeah you can do that. But due to the fact that Lilly herself testified to being beaten. I don't suppose she has to go back there. Have a nice day. ", Cox said and we nodded.

We stayed for a while until Abby came.

"Lilly. Sweetheart. Come let us go to the hotel." Abby said.

"Is he coming?" Lilly asked anxiously.

"No. I'll throw him out, okay?" Abby said and Lilly nodded.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

We sat with our friends at Mollys. We drank a bit and chatted.

"Unimaginable that the court will not send Lilly to you for the time they discuss." Kim said.

"What should they do? The injuries were never properly documented with a photo. They have to rely on a statement from a child." I said.

"Lilly will come to you," Kevin said.

"But it's good that Abby throws her friend out. Then you have achieved everything you wanted. Lilly can live in peace again." Adam said.

"Ruzek. I think there is more behind it. A child can really make you happy." Antonio said.

"Still a reassuring conscience that Lilly does not have to live in his presence anymore," Ruzek said.

My cellphone rang. The display showed Gabby's number. I was wondering. Why should Gabby call me at this late hour?

"Hey." I said. In the background I heard the siren.

"Lilly had an accident." Gabby said, "Come to the Med immediately. We are there in less than 5 minutes."

I was in shock. Speechless.


	13. Chapter 13

**I know, this chapter is very short but I hope you like it anyway.**

 **CPDCPDCPD**

 **Jay POV**

I ran to the emergency room directly to my brother, who was very nervous.

"Will - what happened?" I asked horrified.

"Lilly had an accident." He said worried.

"Is she okay?" I asked anxiously.

"I don't know." He said depressed.

"Can I see her?" I asked desperately.

"Natalie and Dr. Choi take care of her. She is in the best hands." Will said.

"I want to see her," I shouted.

"That will not do." Will said.

"What? What happened? Damn Will, tell me what's going on!" I said desperately.

Helpless, I ran my hand through my hair. My brother stared at me. His eyes couldn't be assigned. Will knew how serious the situation was. If it was a harmless accident he would have told me immediately. But it wasn't a harmless accident. His gaze betrayed that at least.

Natalie came out. "Maggie, we need a child neurologist."

I looked through the windows at the shock room. The medical team stood around the small body. Lilly was bloody and not responsive. The doctors intubated her. She was connected to the medical ventilator. They made an ultrasound of her belly.

"Natalie. Free fluid in the abdomen. She has to go to the operating room right away." Choi said. "Let's go." Natalie said.

My little girl was pushed past me towards the operating rooms. Bloody bandages lay around the floor of the shock room. It didn't look good at all.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

"Are you happy now?" I asked and sat down across from Abby. We sat in the waiting room.

"Jay. Believe me, I had no idea about it." Abby said.

"I thought you wanted to kick him out."

"I did. But he didn't want to leave. "

"And then what happened?"

"We had a fight. Lilly heard everything. He grabbed Lilly and punches her. He blamed Lilly that we couldn't be together anymore. Lilly dropped from a height of almost two and a half meters," she stuttered.

"And you? Where have you been?" I asked.

"What should I have done?" She said, "He would have punched me the same way."

"Didn't you think it necessary to protect our little girl?"

"You can talk well. You weren't there." She said upset, "I didn't notice that my child was beaten, Okay. Not often, though."

"He went too far! Once hit was too much! Why didn't you intervene?"

"That's not that easy." She said.

"Really incredible. And I'm supposed to be a bad father?" I said and took a deep breath, "Was Lilly conscious?"

"Lilly didn't react anymore." She said, "I think she is pitched with the head first. Jay – our child can be dead."

No way. Such an idiot will not take away my child.

"Lilly is a fighter. She is so brave and strong. She still has her life in front of her." I said to calm down. I have to be optimistic.

"Despite everything, we should deal with the thought." She said.

"Why are you fighting for Lilly's custody when you don't want her?"

"We should accept the truth." She said.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

Second by second, minute by minute and hour by hour, fear and hopelessness passed and still no news. Again and again, the large sterile doors to the operating area are opened and doctors and nurses hurry through.

Meanwhile some friends gathered in the waiting room. Among others Gabby and Sylvie. They were the paramedics' suburb. Will also looked over from time to time. He tried to get news. But there was none.

"Halstead, please sit down. They make me confused," Platt said, as I had been walking up and down the hall for quite some time. I couldn't sit still. This uncertainty killed me almost. I mean, so much could go wrong...

"Jay." Antonio said and I gave in. Sitting next to him, I waited for the doors to open, where Lilly was fighting for her life. I was shaking heavily up and down with my left leg. I could not sit quietly and wait. Not now, as long as I don't know what's going on with Lilly.

"I know this uncertainty can kill you, but can you tremble with the other leg? My chair is already shaking." Antonio said.

For a short moment I stopped before I trembled with the other leg. I didn't realize it was so obvious. Abby, however, crossed her arms and waited quietly without causing a stir.

"Trudy. My love. I heard from Dawson what happened," Mouch said, sitting down next to her and holding her hand.

"Randy. I told you about little Lilly, whom I take care of every now and then ... she is a very friendly, sassy and smart girl. She is still so young." Platt said softly. Lilly seemed very close to her heart. Whatever she had done, but Platt was right with her.

"I know. The little girl will not give up without a fight. There is a lot of energy in her." Mouch said.

More and more people joined: Ruzek, Atwater, Olinsky, Burgess, Upton and Voight. Everyone was worried about Lilly's life – everyone except Abby, who doesn't seem to care. Although the Intelligence hadn't known Lilly for a long time, she simply belonged to the family. Everyone has Lilly firmly in his heart.

Voight also told me that they arrested this Bastard. They arrested him when buying cigarettes at a gas station. He behaved calmly and didn't care about the incident. He didn't care about Lilly. Voight locked him in the cage. If Lilly cannot make it, I'll kill him and no one will find his body.

The large sterile doors to the operating room opened. Dr. Manning and Dr. Choi came to the fore.

"I assume you're all relatives of Lilly Halstead," he said in a voice I could not judge. I nodded and looked at him with anxious eyes.


	14. Chapter 14

**Thanks a lot to my beta reader – catchmeinwonderland. :)**

 **I am glad that she corrects my chapters with the aim of improving grammar and spelling now.**

 **CPDCPDCPD**

 **Jay POV**

"Lilly is alive. She had a whole bunch of guardian angels," Nat said and we all breathed in relief.

"But?" I asked, close to speechless.

"Lilly suffered a head injury as well as a blunt abdominal injury with internal bleeding. Luckily, we could stop the bleeding. Lilly is being transferred to the PICU now," Choi said, "We don't know if there will be lasting damage."

"Thanks," I said. "Can we see her?" Natalie nodded.

"Just not all at once," she instructed.

"Abby?" I asked, turning to where she sat in silence, eyes unfocused.

"I can't do this anymore, Jay." She muttered, unmoving. "No matter what the court says, you should get custody. You're the better parent," She admitted.

"Okay," I agreed. "But I think Lilly wants to see us both." I encouraged and she nodded slightly, finally moving.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

We stood in front of the room and looked through the windowpane. Lilly just lay there, connected to the ECG and respirator. The air was introduced through the nasal cannula. The device beeped in recurring intervals, reminding me my daughter was still alive. I quickly detached myself from my thoughts, opened the door, and sat down on the stool next to Lilly's bed. I grabbed my daughter's hand and held it close.

"I'm here Lilly," I whispered, looking at the motionless body. She was so pale. Her body was covered with bruises. It hurt me to see my little girl so full of pain. It was just unbelievable. Abby didn't come in the room with me. She blamed herself for what happened. It was understandable, but Lilly needed us both. For some reason, Abby didn't think that was necessary. One thing is for certain, Lilly can always count on me. I will always stay by her side. She can always come to me no matter what. I will always be there for my little girl.

After a while of holding Lilly's hand, I felt a returning pressure. I had the hand of my seven year old daughter in mine all the time. I paid attention to the movements of the smaller hand, whose grip became stronger. Slowly, she opened her eyes and looked around.

"Daddy?" she whispered weakly, "Where am I?" I could tell she was greatly weakened by the surgery, and it broke my heart.

"I'm here, sweetie," I answered her. "You are in the hospital" I explained, stroking her hair with my other hand. "How do you feel?"

"Tired," she whispered. "Everything hurts. Why are you crying?"

"I'm not crying," I chuckled, trying to hide the tears. "I'm just happy that you're awake. You know, I was very worried about you."

"Worried even more than when I ran away?" she asked, completely exhausted.

"Yeah. I think so," I smiled softly. "I'm glad to be able to take you in my arms again," I said and gave her a kiss on the forehead.

"Where is Mommy?"

"Outside," I pointed to where Abby's figure could be seen through the door.

"Why?" she asked.

"She wanted to give you time because you should rest," I lied.

"Is he here, too?" Lilly asked, remembering the night's events and becoming anxious.

"No," I squeezed her hand. "He was arrested. He will never hurt you again."

"Never ever?"

"Never ever ever," I promised, smiling slightly.

"Hello Lilly," Natalie smiled and walked in. "How do you feel? Any pain?" She questioned. Lilly nodded with a pout on her face.

"Everything hurts," She whispered.

"I'll give you a painkiller right away," Natalie said, "Do you remember what happened?"

Lilly thought for a while before answering. "I fell because he punched me."

"That's right," Natalie said. "Can I do some tests with you to make sure you are okay?" Lilly nodded weakly and I moved out of the way to give the two ladies some space.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

After my visit with Lilly, I stopped at the district. I wanted to teach this bastard a lesson. I was not going to let him get away with nearly killing my daughter.

"Well, Detective Halstead," Alexander grinned greasily. "How is Lilly? Is the little one dead?"

"Wipe that stupid grin off your face." I warned him.

"But Detective," Alexander said. "That's not very nice."

"You've messed with the wrong man. Do you really think you can just beat up my daughter like that? How about if we do the same with you?" I opened the cage door. He was just sitting on the bench and the handcuffs were attached to the wall.

"Jay - don't do that," Al warned from behind me. I didn't even realize he was there. "He doesn't deserve the attention. Drive back to Med. Your daughter needs you."

For a while I stood there thinking. Eventually, I decided to listen to Al and spared this bastard. He was right. Lilly needed me more.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

Day after day passed, and Lilly got better. Even so, she had to stay in the hospital for a while on the Pediatric floor. It was mostly precautionary due to the extent of her injuries. Lilly was very lucky, as she would have no long-term damage.

Within that time, I got an answer from the court, too. After they found out what happened, they granted me sole custody of Lilly. I wasn't serious about taking Lilly's custody, I just wanted this man to leave my daughter alone. After getting custody, I wanted to discuss with Abby how we can both can take care of her, but she refused. While she was in the hospital, Abby only visited Lilly two times. On the second visit, she said goodbye to Lilly, because she wanted to fly back. Lilly was devastated with the news. She put up a fight and refused to let Abby leave, but she was still in recovery and couldn't do much from her bed.

"NO DON'T GO!" Lilly screamed loudly.

"Stop Lilly," Abby demanded. "The decision has been made. You will stay with Jay," Abby instructed her.

"But I want you both!" Lilly continued to cry. "You can't just go! Not now! Please stay with me Mommy," Lilly begged.

"I'm flying back tonight, but I will visit you," Abby explained to her daughter.

"Why are you never there for me?" Lilly asked softly, the realization of Abby's abandonment finally hitting her. My heart broke.

Perplexed, I watched this mother and daughter talk unfold. I stood quietly next to Lilly's hospital bed. This conversation was really none of my business. It was Abby's decision to leave her daughter. I offered for us to take care of Lilly together, but she declined. It wasn't unordinary, many parents live separately and share custody, but Abby was determined to fly back to Afghanistan. I had the feeling that she could no longer look at her daughter properly, knowing that she was responsible for so much of Lilly's pain.

"Do you really think I am never there for you?" Abby asked, shocked.

Lilly was silent and nodded her head. She shouldn't be feeling bad about any of this, Abby should.

"This decision was not easy for me," Abby argued. "You should accept it."

"Please Mommy," Lilly begged. "Think about it again," she whimpered.

"Stop crying," Abby stood up from the bed. "You are no longer a toddler."

"I hate when you leave," Lilly pouted, the anger rising. "I HATE YOU!" she screamed.

"Then hate me," Abby resigned. "But I love you, princess."

"I don't love you," Lilly whispered.

"Lilly. Think about what you said," I told her. It was hard, because I knew how badly Abby hurt her. However, Abby was still her mother.

"But…" Lilly tried to protest, but I interrupted her, "With such a statement you can hurt someone very much," I explained to her. She sighed and looked over at Abby.

"I'm sorry," She apologized. "I don't hate you mommy, but I'm going to really miss you."

"I'm going to miss you, too" Abby said and pulled her daughter into a goodbye hug.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

"Daddy?" Lilly whispered quietly. Several hours had passed since Abby left. Lilly finally calmed down. "Are you going to leave me too?"

"What makes you think that I'm going to leave you?"

"Because of all of this," she gestured to the hospital room.

"Lilly, that's no reason for me to leave you," I told her. "You have to give your mom time. She feels bad about what happened. She blames herself for not being there for you," I explained to her, even though I didn't really expect her to understand. We were silent for a while after that.

"I am glad that I have you Daddy," she smiled. I squeezed her hand. "But can you bring me something else to eat? This food is disgusting," she gestured to whatever the hospital was feeding her.

"You haven't even tried it," I told her.

Lilly grimaced as she held the spoonful of mushy mass in the air and turned the spoon over only to realize that this non-edible substance was sticking to the spoon.

"Daddy, are you hungry?" She asked, looking at me with large dog eyes and offered me some of the mushy rice pudding.

"Oh no," I quickly declined. "You still have to get big and strong."

"This only makes me sick," Lilly complained. I sighed.

"Okay, okay," I agreed. "Do you think we can get a pizza delivered here?" I grinned and dialed the number of a pizzeria, only to be met with success. 45 minutes later, the pizza was delivered to the hospital room. Lilly moved in bed a little to the side so I could lie down comfortably beside her. With relish, we ate our pizza and watched a movie.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

I worked with the rest of the Intelligence team to help make Lilly's days more playful while in the hospital. We played card games, watched movies or just chatted. Sergeant Platt and Mouch even taught Lilly how to play poker, gambling with gummy bears instead of money, of course. Although I was pretty sure that Lilly did not understand the game, she bluffed damnably well, cleaning off half of the gummy bears.

"Whoa Lilly, where do you keep getting these cards?" I asked almost suspiciously. I was on the verge of being ripped off by Lilly, Mouch and Platt.

"Mouch shares them at the beginning," Lilly said in a cute tone with puppy eyes, pulling the gummy bear cluster closer to her. She was eating her bets during the game and still had more than my seven. In the end, however, Platt won, with her gummy bears soon devoured by Lilly as well.

Later in the day, Will came by to check on his niece, which was a welcome surprise.

"How are you Lil?" he asked, reading her chart.

"Much better," she smiled.

"Good to hear," he smiled back. "If you're lucky, you can go home by the end of the week."

"Yes!" Lilly cheered, making my smile grow larger.

"What did you do all day long?" Will asked her.

"Daddy lost when playing poker with Trudy and Mouch," Lilly announced, proudly.

"You play poker?" Will asked and Lilly nodded.

"I hope you have thought that one through, Jay," Will chuckled.

"Sure," I smirked. "Once Lil is 21 years old, we go to the casino and she wins everything up," I grinned.

"Is that really your idea of parenting?" Will asked. "You should teach her something useful."

"Says the one who teaches Lilly swearwords," I pointed out.

"What? Lilly?" Will asked horrified

"You picked me up from school. I quote: Are you handicapped? I would stop right now, you motherfucker." Lilly said. My eyes widened.

"Wow, Will. Don't insult car drivers when Lilly drives with you," I instructed him.

"How did you remember the exact wording? That's impressive," Will said and Lilly nodded.

"What? No, it's just the opposite," I insisted. "You cannot teach Lilly dirty words," I told Will.

"As if you never complain while driving," Will defended.

"Yes, but not with that language and not when Lilly is there," I said.

"Yeah because Dad prefers this," Lilly explained and showed the middle finger. I groaned.

"Yeah. Of course, it's much better," Will laughed.

I sat there perplexed. It definitely was not much better. Children see what the adults do and learn pretty quickly from it. I shouldn't have been surprised my daughter wasn't any different.


	15. Chapter 15

**Jay POV**

To escape the daily routine, I drove with Lilly to north Wisconsin to show her the family cabin. I needed a reboot and tne week vacation seemed to be the best solution. On the long drive I told my daughter the story of my grandfather, or rather, her great-grandfather. Curious, she listened.

"Do I still have a grandma and a grandpa? If so, why don't I know them yet?" she asked after the story.

"You have a grandfather, but you can't meet him," I told her.

"Why not?" she asked, of course.

"It's complicated." I said.

"Why can't I meet your daddy?" She asked, not content with my previous answer.

"It wasn't always easy with him. A lot happened between the two of us before you came along. We don't get along all that well anymore," I told her, hoping that answer would suffice.

"You can get along again," she answered in a way only a child could. I smiled a little.

"I know it sounds silly, but sometimes it's not that easy. It's better the way it is, trust me," I ended the conversation.

Lilly was silent for a while, which was probably for the best.

"Daddy, when will we be there?" she asked after a while.

"It won't be long now," I told her.

"When?" She whined, "Daddy, I'm bored."

"Let's play a game then," I suggested. "How about 'I am packing my suitcase'?"

 **CPDCPDCPD**

"Wow!" Lilly marveled as we pulled in. "This is awesome!"

"Do you like it here?" I asked and Lilly nodded enthusiastically.

"Can we go swimming?" She asked and I nodded, chasing after her as she ran to the water. .

The fresh air and the scent of nature felt liberating. A vacation was long overdue. I sat on the dock and let my feet dangle into the water. My daughter was swimming and diving. At some point she came out and sat down next to me. She gave me a wet hug and tried to push me into the water. In the process she fell into it herself. I laughed and jumped in behind her.

We swam together often over the course of the next few days. We jumped one at a time or together from the dock, played ball and sunbathed. Other days we went for nature walks or hiked up a mountain peak. Much to my chagrin, Lilly took every opportunity to explore and climbed onto some small rocks. Sometimes it looked very dangerous, however, my authority towards her was still limited. Lilly picked up my phone and took a lot of pictures - from the landscape, from herself or from both of us.

"Do you want to take a night hike?" I asked noticing my daughter was still full of energy.

"Seriously? You want me to go out into the dark, where a lot of wild animals are walking around?" she asked in horror.

"Yeah or do you have a problem with that?" I chuckled.

"What if an animal eats me?" She questioned.

"Nothing will eat you up," I promised her.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah I'm sure." I told her, "We won't go far enough for anything too wild," I teased, but Lilly never caught on.

It was completely new to me that she was afraid in the dark. She was never like that otherwise. I should have known given the fact she is seven and keeps the door open at night. Still, she has never let on before.

Together we walked along the trail. It was already very dark outside, which is why Lilly was latched onto my hand. I had a flashlight with me, keeping most of the path lit. At the sound of crunching branches, Lilly winced and hardened her grip.

"Sweetie, it was just a branch," I comforted her.

"Are you sure?" Lilly asked frightened.

"Yes," I said, getting down to her level. "Lil, you don't need to be afraid. I'm here," She nodded, so I squeezed her hand and stood back up.

We went for a short round and returned to the house. Lilly let out a sigh of relief and sat down on the couch.

"Would you like something to drink ... maybe a hot chocolate?" I offered softly and Lilly nodded. So I made her a cup of cocoa and joined her on the couch.

"Since when do you have a fear of the dark?" I wondered. Lilly just shrugged her shoulders.

"Daddy?" Lilly asked hesitantly.

"Yes?" I answered.

"Is the Slenderman real?" Lilly whispered. It took all I had to not laugh out loud. This poor girl. "Samuel said the Slenderman can teleport and kill in the woods at night." Lilly said curtly and leaned against me.

"Then point out to Samuel that there is no Slenderman, and there will never be one. Lil, it's all fantasy. Slenderman isn't real," I told her, smiling.

"Really?" she asked, hopeful.

"Really," I said and put my arm around her until she fell asleep peacefully.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

 **Lilly POV**

Dad is undercover for a few days, so Uncle Will was supposed to take care of me. He can't though, because his friends are sick and now he has to work all the time to cover for them. The old neighbor was on vacation and so Voight sent me my new babysitter Adam over.

"Yo, Lil! What's up?" He asked as he picked me up at school.

"Hey Adam! Can we go to the park?" I asked and he nodded.

As I played around on the playground, Ruzek sat on a bench and watched.

"I'm thirsty," I ran over to him and said.

"Do you still have water in your water bottle?" He asked me and I shook my head.

"Here," A woman said and held her water out to me. I looked at Adam for permission. He nodded, so I took a sip.

"Thank you," We said at the same time.

"You're welcome," she said, turning to Adam, "your daughter looks really adorable. I love single fathers with daughters."

I smirked at Adam. He looked very shocked, but recovered quickly. ..

"Thank you," he stumbled. "Yeah. My Lilly is the most important thing in my life," He said, pulling me closer towards him.

"Daddy, can I get an ice cream later?" I asked with an over-friendly grin.

"Sure thing. Baby girl," he poked me, making me giggle. This was fun. .

"Aw. Your father-daughter bond is really impressive," the woman beamed.

"You are welcome to come along if you like," Adam invited her. The woman smiled even more.

"I would like that very much," the woman answered.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

Adam and I played our roles perfectly. The woman had a 4 year old daughter whom she also brought along. Together we all ate ice cream, almost like a family. Later, both exchanged phone numbers.

Adam swarmed over her all evening long. I think he is in love. We ended the evening with a pillow fight. The next day, Adam picked me up from school and we went to the park. Now Adam got down to single moms.

"Hello. Can I maybe sit next to her?" Adam asked.

"Hey. Very much," rejoiced the woman and they introduced each other.

"So Adam. You work in a special police unit and have a beautiful daughter." she repeated his answer.

"It looks like that, and yet I have enough time to look after my daughter." Adam said

"A true gentleman. You really do everything for her." She smiled.

"Yes. A child can one grow very fond of." Adam grinned

"Ruzek, I'm thirsty." I said.

"Ruzek?" She asked confused.

"Yes. Lilly... she calls me by last name because everyone does." Adam said sheepishly.

"Ah yes ... sure." she said uncertainly.

"Ruzek likes to make flour battles with me." I said

"She really is your daughter?" She asked uncertainly.

"Do not you see our similarity?" I exclaimed indignantly

"Honestly, no," she said.

"Ruzek that means you're NOT MY DADDY!" Lilly shouted, looking at me with a nasty grin.

"I think uh I have to go. Bye." she said and disappeared.

"Thank you little monster." Adam said

"I played along." I said

"Not really." Adam said and we drove home.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

5 days without Dad or Uncle Will were really strange. Adam was a good babysitter and you have a lot of fun with him, but that was not the same. Somehow the order is missing. Tomorrow we have a date with a woman and her four-year-old daughter. The two were very friendly and humorous.

Curious, I looked to Adam when cooking. He wanted to do a candle light dinner with me. 4 course menu. He probably just wanted to try out if he could be a gentleman. Of course, there were children's champagne because I still cannot drink alcohol.

"I cannot manage to eat anymore," I said, pushing the plate aside.

"How can you not anymore? There is still dessert." Adam said.

"It's so much, but delicious." I grinned.

"Eat otherwise there will be no dessert." Adam said.

At the same time there was a rustling at the door. Curious, I stood up.

"Daddy!" I screamed and hugged him stormy.

"Hey sweetie. How are you?" Dad asked.

"Very good. The days were awesome fun because Adam took care of me." I grinned and said quickly, "But I missed you every now and then."

"I really do hope so. I missed you a lot." Dad grinned and looked around the living room, "Adam. What did you do with my apartment?"

Presumably, Dad meant the untidy living room, where the packaging and garbage left lying around. Or just the fact that it looked partly as if it had snowed.

"Um. What did we do, Lil?" Adam asked.

"A flour fight, a pillow fight, then the food in the microwave exploded ..." I listed. Dad looked puzzled between me and Adam.

"A recommendation as a babysitter you will not get from me. You both clean up afterwards." Dad grinned.

"But it's your apartment. Then you can tidy up." I said.

"Don't get cheeky." Dad grinned, "What about Will? Why couldn't he take care of Lilly?"

"The med has too few doctors at the moment." Ruzek said and Dad nodded.

"Daddy. Adam cooked a candle light dinner because we have a date tomorrow. And you can eat my leftovers so I can get dessert." I grinned.

"Did I hear right? You both have a date?" Dad asked horrified.

"No. So. Um. You have somehow come inappropriately." I stated and Adam nodded.

"What? My own daughter throws me out of my apartment?" Dad grinned.

"No. Only Adam has flirt with women and tomorrow we have a date with a woman and her daughter. And both think that Adam is my dad." I explained.

Overwhelming, Dad looked at us.

"Do I understand correctly? I've just been undercover for 5 days and you're looking for a new dad?" Dad laughed.

"That's it - Halstead." Adam grinned.

"Well then. I will not stand in the way of your date." Dad grinned.

Together we finished our meal.

"I'm tired. Good night." I faked a yawn because I had no desire to clean up.

"Moment. Young lady you will help." Adam said.

"I'm tired. Daddy says something." I said.

"Listen to Adam." Dad said.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

"Daddy? May I sleep with you?" I asked softly. I stood in front of his bed and clutched my stuffed animal. Dad was asleep and didn´t hear me.

"Daddy? Wake up." I said a little louder.

"Lil what's wrong?" He muttered sleepily

"I cannot sleep."

"And now?"

"May I sleep with you?"

"Um. Then come here." Dad muttered and I crawled to him.

"Did you have a bad dream?" Dad asked.

"No, but it's thunderstruck."


	16. Chapter 16

**Jay POV**

"Tell me, do you have a secret admirer or why does your mobile phone ring constantly?" Antonio complained.

"If I knew, I could tell you," I said.

It was strange. For a few days now, I've been receiving strange text messages or phone calls - all from women who would like to get to know me better.

"Come on, Halstead, you can tell me," Antonio laughed.

"I'm serious. I have no idea where they got all my number from," I said.

"They all?" Ruzek said horrified.

"At least it's different numbers," I said.

"Interesting. Can you give me one, yes? "Ruzek grinned and returned to the paperwork, while Antonio disappeared to the break room. At the same moment my mobile rang again. The display showed me an unknown number.

"Halstead?" I said

"Hello. Here is Tiffany. I saw your profile and ..." a female voice answered on the other end of the line. Before she could finish her sentence, I hung up the phone call.

"You should consider changing the phone number," Atwater grinned.

"Haha." I said ironically.

As I continued my work, I pondered what profile she meant, but I could not think of anything.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

"Lil. I would be grateful if I could still use my laptop today. "I said annoyed and got me a beer from the fridge. Lately she was always in front of it.

"Yes. Later." she said.

"What are you doing?" I asked curiously. As I approached, Lilly closed it hectically.

"A school presentation."

"About what?"

"About ... animals." she said hesitantly.

"Animals? Can I take a look at your presentation?" I asked.

"No. Because it's not finished yet. "

"Maybe I can help you. I could give you advice."

"No, that will not work. We should do a presentation by ourself. "

"Aha. You know, I've got many mysterious calls lately. I think you're behind it. "

"Uh… no. I don't know it." Lilly is holding the laptop shut.

"Open the laptop."

"It does not work. He has to rest." she said.

"Alright. What are you hiding? ", I asked curiously and took the laptop from her hand. Silently she sat in front of me and avoided my glances.

"You signed me up on a dating site!" I exclaimed stunned as I discovered my profile. Lilly nodded slightly.

"What do you think? You can't create a profile without my knowledge and publish my number! "I excited myself.

"Yes, but you have been lonely for so long."

"I am by no means lonely, after all I have you," I calmed down.

"I do not mean that."

"Lil. That's nice of you, but you do not have to worry about my love life," I said

"Otherwise you would have had a girlfriend long ago," Lilly said

"I have not found the right one yet." I said. "Can we please delete the account?"

Of course I have found the right one for a long time. _Erin_. Only she lives in New York now.

"They are all arrogant and stupid anyway." Lilly muttered.

"Lilly, I really don't need a wife or girlfriend. I'm happy, and I just need you for that."

"But siblings would be nice."

"Maybe one day." I cheer her up and began to read my profile.

"Single father is looking for a wife for life. I am very humorous and am looking for a loving, child-loving partner for a common and beautiful future. My interest is very versatile and I am very enterprising..."

"I'm sorry," Lilly mumbled.

"After all, you made me look attractive," I grinned.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

"Dad, you have to get ready." Lilly urged.

"No stress. I'm looking good, right? "I asked.

"If you understand that as well ... then yes." Lilly replied cheekily.

I can't believe it. Antonio, Ruzek, Kim, and Lilly persuaded me to go on a date with a woman I do not know. For days they annoyed me. I do not want a relationship. At least not anymore, but they did not understand it.

"Better?" I asked. I was wearing a black suit with a light blue shirt.

"Yes." Lilly grinned.

"Woe you make such a mess again." I said.

"Do not worry, dad. This time Antonio is watching me. "

"If that's really better, I doubt it." I grinned.

Shortly afterwards, Antonio came by and I said goodbye.

 **CPDCPDCPD**

I was not motivated. I was forced to this date. I was standing in front of an Italian restaurant waiting for my date in the cold. It was early December and the first light snow lay on the streets of Chicago. Impatiently I looked at the clock. She was anything but punctual.

"Hello Jay." I heard a familiar voice. Slowly I turned around ... and there she stood. Overwhelmed, I looked into her beautiful hazel eyes.

"Erin." I said almost speechless.

"How are you?" Erin asked softly.

"Fine, and you?" I stammered.

"Me too."

"What are you doing in Chicago? I thought you were in New York. "

"New York is not the same." She stated.

"So that means you stay?"

Our conversation was interrupted by two curious chickpeas who were gesticulating wildly.

"Ey! You really don't understand anything." Lilly said and came out with Antonio behind a car.

"What don't we understand?" I asked.

"You guys should kiss." Lilly replied cheekily. A grin spread across my face. I approached Erin and grabbed her with one hand on her hip and with her other hand against her cheek. We kissed tenderly.

"I missed you." I whispered.

"And I love you," Erin added and we kissed again.

"Uh. I think our job is done here." Antonio cleared his throat, "Have a nice evening."

"Lilly. Would you like to join us?" Erin asked.

Lilly shook her head. "I'll stay overnight with Antonio, so you have the apartment for you later."

Surprised, I looked at my little girl. She really was a badass girl. Luckily otherwise I would not have gone to this date tonight.

 **The End**

Hi. So that was the story. I am currently writing a new story **"Everything we want"**

Bye lelema


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